Wikipedia:Featured article candidates/Banded stilt/archive1

The following is an archived discussion of a featured article nomination. Please do not modify it. Subsequent comments should be made on the article's talk page or in Wikipedia talk:Featured article candidates. No further edits should be made to this page.

The article was promoted by Sarastro1 via FACBot (talk) 21:46, 28 April 2017 [1].

Banded stilt

Nominator(s): Cas Liber (talk · contribs) 11:46, 7 April 2017 (UTC)[reply]

This article is about a cool Australian bird that's had some really interesting new knowledge about it become known in the past few years. I've scoured material and reckon its pretty complete. It got a grilling at GAN by Funkmonk. Have at it. cheers, Cas Liber (talk · contribs) 11:46, 7 April 2017 (UTC)[reply]

Resolved comments from 1989 17:12, 9 April 2017 (UTC)[reply]

Comment from 1989

Could you add alt text to the images? 1989 16:09, 7 April 2017 (UTC)[reply]

added Cas Liber (talk · contribs) 16:20, 7 April 2017 (UTC)[reply]

For the taking off, Port Fairy image, there needs to be an {{flickrreview}} template at the bottom of the license template, and the license needs to be changed to 2.0 for accuracy. -- 1989 19:39, 7 April 2017 (UTC)[reply]

done Cas Liber (talk · contribs) 21:47, 7 April 2017 (UTC)[reply]

Comments by Riley

As always some quick comments (Note: If I stop reviewing at any time and if all of my comments were addressed or commented on, please disregard this or regard this as a weak support).

Maybe add a picture or two to the behaviour section? If you can't find any showing the banded stilt relevant to the section, then maybe include a picture of its prey or something like that.

got a pic of a brine shrimp from the Coorong that it eats Cas Liber (talk · contribs) 00:41, 8 April 2017 (UTC)[reply]

Be consistent about putting the scientific name in parentheses after the common name. For example, you didn't do it in the lead.

Ah, see I did have them but FunkMonk thought they were better left out of lead. Cas Liber (talk · contribs) 00:41, 8 April 2017 (UTC)[reply]

Sounds good, makes sense. Anyways, error code. RileyBugz ^{Yell at me} | _Edits 00:56, 8 April 2017 (UTC)[reply]

The intro is just a summary, so doesn't need all the detail of the article body. FunkMonk (talk) 10:30, 8 April 2017 (UTC)[reply]

The sentence "As well as banded stilt, the species has also been called locally Rottnest snipe, or bishop snipe," is confusing. Specifically, the ordering of the names is confusing. Say the it is called the "Rottnest snipe, or bishop snipe" kind of feels like you are saying that Rottnest is synonymous with bishop. Also, there should be a definite article before "banded stilt" and likely "bishop snipe" if you change the wording.

I have rejigged that whole bit actually. Cas Liber (talk · contribs) 00:53, 8 April 2017 (UTC)[reply]

Link "scrape" in sentence three of the second lead paragraph.

linked Cas Liber (talk · contribs) 00:41, 8 April 2017 (UTC)[reply]

In the sentence "French ornithologist Louis Jean Pierre Vieillot described the banded stilt in 1816, classifying it in the avocet genus Recurvirostra and giving it the name Recurvirostra leucocephala, "L'avocette a tete blanche" ("white-headed avocet"), though the type locality has been listed as either Victoria or Rottnest Island in Western Australia," I don't exactly see the connection between "though the type locality has been listed as either Victoria or Rottnest Island in Western Australia". Also, if you meant that he listed the type locality, then you should additionally convert present tense verbs (like "has") to their past tense versions.

I expanded - a location should accompany a species description, however Viellot did not give enough detail as to where it might be Cas Liber (talk · contribs) 04:58, 9 April 2017 (UTC)[reply]

Looks good now. RileyBugz ^{Yell at me} | _Edits 20:16, 9 April 2017 (UTC)[reply]

Will (hopefully) do more soon. RileyBugz ^{Yell at me} | _Edits 22:07, 7 April 2017 (UTC)[reply]

Soon to be long, daunting list that has nitpicks that, together, will take hours to complete:

Maybe reword "Other common names include Rottnest snipe, and bishop snipe," to "Other common names include the bishop snipe and Rottnest snipe." This is because 1) The comma in the original sentence is unneeded. 2) Having "the" before bishop snipe sounds better. RileyBugz ^{Yell at me} | _Edits 01:05, 8 April 2017 (UTC)[reply]

See this sounds really peculiar to me - I'd never put a "the" here. "The" is not part of the name and we're using the name as word-as-word. Cas Liber (talk · contribs) 06:02, 8 April 2017 (UTC)[reply]

Huh. Well then why don't you reverse the order, remove the "the" I suggested, and then put the two names in quotes per MOS:WORDSASWORDS. RileyBugz ^{Yell at me} | _Edits 16:16, 8 April 2017 (UTC)[reply]

done Cas Liber (talk · contribs) 22:53, 8 April 2017 (UTC)[reply]

Possibly add a comma before "but" in the sentence "In flight, the wings are mostly black when seen from above but have a white trailing edge from the tips of the inner primaries." Might be ok though, your call really. RileyBugz ^{Yell at me} | _Edits 01:05, 8 April 2017 (UTC)[reply]

added Cas Liber (talk · contribs) 06:02, 8 April 2017 (UTC)[reply]

Definitely add a comma before "but" in this sentence: "Non-breeding plumage is similar but the chest band is less distinct and often diluted to an ashy brown or mottled with white." RileyBugz ^{Yell at me} | _Edits 01:05, 8 April 2017 (UTC)[reply]

added Cas Liber (talk · contribs) 06:02, 8 April 2017 (UTC)[reply]

In the sentence "Adults in breeding plumage are predominantly white with black wings and a broad well-demarcated u-shaped chestnut band across the breast," the phrase "well-demarcated" is a little over the top. Maybe use a more "common" word? RileyBugz ^{Yell at me} | _Edits 16:18, 8 April 2017 (UTC)[reply]

that's the problem...I can't think of one... Cas Liber (talk · contribs) 23:09, 8 April 2017 (UTC)[reply]

Maybe say something like "a broad, defined u-shaped..."? RileyBugz ^{Yell at me} | _Edits 23:42, 8 April 2017 (UTC)[reply]

See to me, "defined" used in that way is more obscure than "well-demarcated".....Cas Liber (talk · contribs) 04:48, 9 April 2017 (UTC)[reply]

Ok. In that case, it would probably be best to make an interwiki link to wiktionary here. RileyBugz ^{Yell at me} | _Edits 19:57, 9 April 2017 (UTC)[reply]

I don't know what you were doing here: "The slender bill is black,[21], relatively straight,[22] and twice as long as the head." (I left the commas in) RileyBugz ^{Yell at me} | _Edits 16:19, 8 April 2017 (UTC)[reply]

ensuring the pertinent references come after commas. Cas Liber (talk · contribs) 23:08, 8 April 2017 (UTC)[reply]

No, right after ref 21... RileyBugz ^{Yell at me} | _Edits 23:42, 8 April 2017 (UTC)[reply]

aaaah I see now. fixed Cas Liber (talk · contribs) 04:47, 9 April 2017 (UTC)[reply]

I'm pretty sure that the sentence "Juvenile birds resemble adults but lack the breast band and have greyish lores and forehead," is grammatically correct, but it may be better to reword the last part, as it sounds odd nonetheless. RileyBugz ^{Yell at me} | _Edits 16:22, 8 April 2017 (UTC)[reply]

rejigged Cas Liber (talk · contribs) 23:07, 8 April 2017 (UTC)[reply]

Two choppy sentences next to eachother: "The black on their wings is often duller. Adult plumage is attained in the second year." RileyBugz ^{Yell at me} | _Edits 16:23, 8 April 2017 (UTC)[reply]

rejigged (see above) Cas Liber (talk · contribs) 23:07, 8 April 2017 (UTC)[reply]

Probably link "saltworks" in the sentence " In Western Australia, it is found predominantly in the southwestern corner, though can be as far north as the saltworks in Port Hedland." RileyBugz ^{Yell at me} | _Edits 16:24, 8 April 2017 (UTC)[reply]

link added Cas Liber (talk · contribs) 22:53, 8 April 2017 (UTC)[reply]

The sentence "Breeding took place at Lake Ballard in the Goldfields-Esperance after heavy rainfall from Cyclone Bobby in 1995, and flooding in 2014," reads a bit oddly, suggests that that was the only place where breeding took place during those years, and suggests two Cyclone Bobby's. RileyBugz ^{Yell at me} | _Edits 16:27, 8 April 2017 (UTC)[reply]

I tried this, does that help? Cas Liber (talk · contribs) 23:07, 8 April 2017 (UTC)[reply]

Definitely better. It may be better to rejig it so you can say something like "Breeding also...", just to make it clear that breeding didn't take place only there during those years. RileyBugz ^{Yell at me} | _Edits 23:44, 8 April 2017 (UTC)[reply]

But that's the thing - as far as we know they only bred there twice in 20 years...and went elsewhere at other times Cas Liber (talk · contribs) 04:45, 9 April 2017 (UTC)[reply]

That's pretty weird. RileyBugz ^{Yell at me} | _Edits 19:51, 9 April 2017 (UTC)[reply]

Link first occurrence of "breeding plumage" and "non-breeding plumage". RileyBugz ^{Yell at me} | _Edits 19:53, 9 April 2017 (UTC)[reply]

I can only link to plumage as there are no destinations for the other terms Cas Liber (talk · contribs) 12:23, 10 April 2017 (UTC)[reply]

What about using that bird glossary? RileyBugz ^{Yell at me} | _Edits 16:59, 10 April 2017 (UTC)[reply]

Correct instances where a lower numbered references occurs directly after a higher numbered references. E.g., fix "...[5][2]" to "...[2][5]". RileyBugz ^{Yell at me} | _Edits 19:55, 9 April 2017 (UTC)[reply]

done Cas Liber (talk · contribs) 12:23, 10 April 2017 (UTC)[reply]

In the sentence "The Ngarrindjeri people of the Lower Murray region in South Australia knew it as nilkani," link "Lower Murray". RileyBugz ^{Yell at me} | _Edits 19:55, 9 April 2017 (UTC)[reply]

done Cas Liber (talk · contribs) 12:23, 10 April 2017 (UTC)[reply]

Instead of saying "upper tail" in the sentence "The central part of the upper tail is tinted a pale grey-brown," maybe say "base of the upper tail"? RileyBugz ^{Yell at me} | _Edits 20:01, 9 April 2017 (UTC)[reply]

done Cas Liber (talk · contribs) 12:25, 10 April 2017 (UTC)[reply]

Probably remove the hyphen in the sentence "The legs are a paler or orange-pink," to make it clear that the "paler" and the "orange" are referring to the pink. RileyBugz ^{Yell at me} | _Edits 20:05, 9 April 2017 (UTC)[reply]

added hyphen to paler Cas Liber (talk · contribs) 12:23, 10 April 2017 (UTC)[reply]

In the sentence "Juvenile birds resemble adults but have greyish lores and forehead, duller black wings, and lack the characteristic breast band," the first part sounds a bit odd, maybe try and reword it? RileyBugz ^{Yell at me} | _Edits 20:06, 9 April 2017 (UTC)[reply]

like that? Cas Liber (talk · contribs) 12:23, 10 April 2017 (UTC)[reply]

Hmmm... maybe add "both" before "a"? RileyBugz ^{Yell at me} | _Edits 20:39, 10 April 2017 (UTC)[reply]

Could you please specific where on the nest in the sentence "Birds also chatter softly and tunefully while on the nest." Like is it on top, perching, etc. RileyBugz ^{Yell at me} | _Edits 20:15, 9 April 2017 (UTC)[reply]

changed to "while nesting" Cas Liber (talk · contribs) 12:23, 10 April 2017 (UTC)[reply]

Link "gregarious" in the sentence "The banded stilt is gregarious; birds are almost always encountered in groups, from small troops of tens of birds, to huge flocks numbering in the tens of thousands." RileyBugz ^{Yell at me} | _Edits 20:41, 10 April 2017 (UTC)[reply]

done Cas Liber (talk · contribs) 22:14, 10 April 2017 (UTC)[reply]

Link "nomadic" in the sentence "The banded stilt is nomadic and generally found in southern Australia." RileyBugz ^{Yell at me} | _Edits 22:18, 10 April 2017 (UTC)[reply]

Unfortunately nomad is purely about humans...and I can't find a good target. Cas Liber (talk · contribs) 01:24, 11 April 2017 (UTC)[reply]

Then define it. RileyBugz ^{Yell at me} | _Edits 11:37, 11 April 2017 (UTC)[reply]

Ok, linked to Bird_migration#Short-distance_and_altitudinal_migration then. I added a bit to the destination. Cas Liber (talk · contribs) 14:01, 11 April 2017 (UTC)[reply]

It seems unneeded to have both paragraphs one and three in the distribution section start out by mentioning that the bird is nomadic. RileyBugz ^{Yell at me} | _Edits 22:18, 10 April 2017 (UTC)[reply]

removed one Cas Liber (talk · contribs) 01:24, 11 April 2017 (UTC)[reply]

Link "fawn" in the sentence "Egg clutches number three to four (or rarely five) oval eggs, which vary from fawn to white marked with brown to black splotches." RileyBugz ^{Yell at me} | _Edits 20:47, 11 April 2017 (UTC)[reply]

linked Cas Liber (talk · contribs) 23:34, 16 April 2017 (UTC)[reply]

It might be better to say "and" instead of "by" in the sentence "They can be 49–58 mm (1.9–2.3 in) long by 35–48 mm (1.4–1.9 in) wide" because "by" is usually used when length/width aren't written. RileyBugz ^{Yell at me} | _Edits 20:48, 11 April 2017 (UTC)[reply]

not sold on this but not overly fussed either way. done. Cas Liber (talk · contribs) 23:34, 16 April 2017 (UTC)[reply]

Wait, I thought that only eggs were incubated: " Incubation takes 19 to 21 days,[20] with both sexes sharing duties, although the male takes over as sole incubator as the eggs hatch and immediately afterwards." RileyBugz ^{Yell at me} | _Edits 20:50, 11 April 2017 (UTC)[reply]

well, he keeps on nest duty afterwards with the babies. Cas Liber (talk · contribs) 23:34, 16 April 2017 (UTC)[reply]

In the sentence "They also eat molluscs, including both gastropods such as the land snail Salinator fragilis and members of the genus Coxiella, and bivalves of the genus Sphaericum, insects (such as bugs, beetles, flies and flying ants, which they glean from the water surface), and plants such as Ruppia," could you please link gastropods, molluscs, bivalves, maybe insects, but definitely the ones in the "such as", and glean. RileyBugz ^{Yell at me} | _Edits 20:54, 11 April 2017 (UTC)[reply]

I linked the shell types, but felt insects and molluscs were too broad to be of use. And trying to avoid a sea of blue. Cas Liber (talk · contribs) 23:34, 16 April 2017 (UTC)[reply]

Makes sense. RileyBugz ^{Yell at me} | _Edits 11:47, 17 April 2017 (UTC)[reply]

Expand "DEWNR" per MOS:ACRO. RileyBugz ^{Yell at me} | _Edits 20:57, 11 April 2017 (UTC)[reply]

done and linked Cas Liber (talk · contribs) 23:34, 16 April 2017 (UTC)[reply]

Support - Fixed all of my nitpicks. RileyBugz ^{Yell at me} | _Edits 11:47, 17 April 2017 (UTC)[reply]

Comment by JennyOz

Cool bird, as you say. The 'tracking devices to 21 birds' bit is repeated. JennyOz (talk) 02:07, 8 April 2017 (UTC)[reply]

wow, not sure how that happened...or that I missed it ("a bit like "Paris in the the spring"...). fixed now. Cas Liber (talk · contribs) 06:04, 8 April 2017 (UTC)[reply]

Support - fine bird, fine article. JennyOz (talk) 08:42, 20 April 2017 (UTC)[reply]

Support Comments from Jim

Another one I've seen! The usual nitpicks Jimfbleak - talk to me? 13:33, 10 April 2017 (UTC)[reply]

tiny shrimp—just checking that this is correct in OzE. It's certainly OK in AE, but BE would have "shrimps"

really?? ...whoa that sounds so weird Cas Liber (talk · contribs) 14:16, 10 April 2017 (UTC)[reply]

His countryman Georges Cuvier—last person mentioned was Amateur ornithologist Gregory Mathews. Although you don't mention his nationality the the text, he definitely wasn't Cuvier's compatriot…

oh arse...I changed the order and stuffed my neat descriptor...fixed now Cas Liber (talk · contribs) 14:16, 10 April 2017 (UTC)[reply]

John Gould had described it as—subject of "it" is a bit remote

depronouned Cas Liber (talk · contribs) 14:16, 10 April 2017 (UTC)[reply]

The banded stilt forages… The bulk of their—number disagreement

singularised Cas Liber (talk · contribs) 14:16, 10 April 2017 (UTC)[reply]

is listed as Vulnerable under the South Australian—make it clear it's LC in the other relevant states if that is indeed the case

this is tricky, as I think LC is just not listed as anything in other states Cas Liber (talk · contribs) 14:16, 10 April 2017 (UTC)[reply]

I had to read the Paris bit above twice before it clicked... All OK, changed to support above, I'll go and buy shrimps for my lunch now Jimfbleak - talk to me? 06:00, 11 April 2017 (UTC)[reply]

Image review - all images are appropriately licensed and sourced. I'd recommend right aligning the shrimp image so it doesn't interfere with the "Breeding" header (and so the shrimp "face" the text), and add the "upright" parameter. FunkMonk (talk) 12:16, 13 April 2017 (UTC)[reply]

Source review - spotchecks not done

Some of your locations are a bit inconsistent - for example, why include country for London but not Stuttgart?

added Cas Liber (talk · contribs) 02:47, 21 April 2017 (UTC)[reply]

GBooks links should be trimmed

trimmed (I think) Cas Liber (talk · contribs) 02:47, 21 April 2017 (UTC)[reply]

FN10, 17: page?

cannot figure it out for former, added for latter Cas Liber (talk · contribs) 02:47, 21 April 2017 (UTC)[reply]

Fn33 should use pp, as should FN37

added Cas Liber (talk · contribs) 02:47, 21 April 2017 (UTC)[reply]

Emu or The Emu?

definite article subtracted Cas Liber (talk · contribs) 02:55, 21 April 2017 (UTC)[reply]

Formatting of FN39 doesn't match the rest

reformatted Cas Liber (talk · contribs) 02:47, 21 April 2017 (UTC)[reply]

Publisher and location for FN10? Nikkimaria (talk) 00:39, 21 April 2017 (UTC)[reply]

added Cas Liber (talk · contribs) 20:27, 24 April 2017 (UTC)[reply]

Closing note: This candidate has been promoted, but there may be a delay in bot processing of the close. Please see WP:FAC/ar, and leave the {{featured article candidates}} template in place on the talk page until the bot goes through. Sarastro1 (talk) 21:46, 28 April 2017 (UTC)[reply]

The above discussion is preserved as an archive. Please do not modify it. No further edits should be made to this page.