Jump to content

Wikipedia:Featured article candidates/Aleeta curvicosta/archive1

Add links
From Wikipedia, the free encyclopedia
The following is an archived discussion of a featured article nomination. Please do not modify it. Subsequent comments should be made on the article's talk page or in Wikipedia talk:Featured article candidates. No further edits should be made to this page.

The article was promoted by Ian Rose 10:01, 17 August 2013 (UTC) [1].[reply]

Aleeta curvicosta

[edit]

Aleeta curvicosta (edit | talk | history | protect | delete | links | watch | logs | views)

Toolbox
Nominator(s): Cas Liber (talk · contribs) 20:49, 31 July 2013 (UTC) & 99of9 (talk · contribs)[reply]

The floury baker is a cute and loud cicada and is another critter found in my garden I have buffed for hopeful FA status. A bulk of work was done by 99of9. With two of us co-nomming we should be able to answer queries double quick...have at it..CHEEP. Cas Liber (talk · contribs) 20:49, 31 July 2013 (UTC)[reply]

Comments from Ceranthor
Lead
  • Floury bakers are popular with children due to their distinctive appearance and loud call. - Appearances so it matches the subject
umm, 'appearance' is a collective noun and hence singular. Cas Liber (talk · contribs) 11:42, 2 August 2013 (UTC)[reply]
  • The species is preyed upon by a wide variety of birds, cicada killer wasps and a cicada-specific fungal disease. - Is it really preyed upon by fungi?
lead rejigged Cas Liber (talk · contribs) 11:50, 2 August 2013 (UTC)[reply]
Description
  • Measuring 9–10 cm (4 in) in length,[9] - There's no difference between the conversions for these two?
  • about 200 nm in height, separated by about 180 nm. - Just impractical to convert?
nanometres are way too small to convert to imperial units... Cas Liber (talk · contribs) 11:51, 2 August 2013 (UTC)[reply]
  • These are thought to aid in anti-reflective camouflage, anti-wetting, and self-cleaning.[12][11] - Keep the lack of serial comma consistent, and don't use it here!
removed comma Cas Liber (talk · contribs) 09:39, 2 August 2013 (UTC)[reply]
  • The abdominal tracheal air sacs surround the sound muscles and extend into the abdomen, acting as a resonant chamber to amplify sound. - Does each act as a chamber? Then it should be chambers.
pluralised Cas Liber (talk · contribs) 11:42, 2 August 2013 (UTC)[reply]
  • ,[18] and has been rhetorically termed "the best musician of them all".[5] - Rhetorically?
removed it Cas Liber (talk · contribs) 11:42, 2 August 2013 (UTC)[reply]
Life cycle
  • growing and feeding through their rostrum on the sap from tree roots, moulting five times, before emerging from the ground to shed their final shell.[21][22] - This sentence is a mess!
sentence massaged for flow and split Cas Liber (talk · contribs) 14:22, 2 August 2013 (UTC)[reply]
  • It then extracts its head and clypeus by hunching its body, and when they are out, arches back to draw the legs out of their casing.[22] - Changing plurality of subject?
the "they" refers to the head and clypeus - have reworded it a little to make it more obvious (?) Cas Liber (talk · contribs) 11:54, 2 August 2013 (UTC)[reply]
Distribution
  • The floury baker is found from the Daintree River in North Queensland through to Bendalong in southern New South Wales.[3] - Could we get rid of "through" and just use to?
yup. removed Cas Liber (talk · contribs) 09:36, 2 August 2013 (UTC)[reply]
Predation
  • brush wattlebirds, white-faced herons, and even the nocturnal tawny frogmouth, - Serial comma absence should stay consistent!
removed comma Cas Liber (talk · contribs) 09:38, 2 August 2013 (UTC)[reply]

Good work. ceranthor 05:57, 2 August 2013 (UTC)[reply]

Support. ceranthor 15:34, 2 August 2013 (UTC)[reply]

Support Comments from Jim I must have heard these without knowing what they were. Generally sound, but a few infelicities. Jimfbleak - talk to me? 07:47, 3 August 2013 (UTC)[reply]

  • Its eyes and body are generally brown with pale patterns including a pale line—two "pale"s, and seems odd to put eyes before body
switched and one pale --> light Cas Liber (talk · contribs) 21:11, 3 August 2013 (UTC)[reply]
  • The female is larger than the male, although their size—clunky change from singular to plural even if grammatical
changed to "although species size overall... " Cas Liber (talk · contribs) 13:36, 3 August 2013 (UTC)[reply]
  • A solitary cicada...—lots of "can"s in this para
one removed, leaving two. Removing either of the remaining leaves alternatives that are wordier... Cas Liber (talk · contribs) 20:57, 3 August 2013 (UTC)[reply]
  • uncal lobes—redlinked and unexplained
specific term used in describing cicada male genitalia. Need to think about this.... Cas Liber (talk · contribs) 21:49, 3 August 2013 (UTC)[reply]
  • The floury baker gains its common...—lots of "common"s in this para
removed two... Cas Liber (talk · contribs) 20:57, 3 August 2013 (UTC)[reply]
  • 9–10 cm (4 in) in length,[9] with forewings between 3 and 5.1 cm (1.4–2 in) long,—If you are converting to 1 sig fig, the second range should be 1–2. If to 2 sig fig, the first should be 3.5–3.9 and the second 1.4–2.0
I'll take 3.5–4.... Cas Liber (talk · contribs)
  • Their wings are transparent—Preceding sentences have a singular subject, what does "their" refer too?
changed to definite article - clearly the cicada..... Cas Liber (talk · contribs) 21:06, 3 August 2013 (UTC)[reply]
  • one second sibilant—hyphen, I think
added Cas Liber (talk · contribs) 21:00, 3 August 2013 (UTC)[reply]
  • they are often found on various species of Melaleuca... It was associated—change from plural to singular
rewritten and trimmed a bit Cas Liber (talk · contribs) 21:05, 3 August 2013 (UTC)[reply]
  • wrens —you are hereby expelled from the bird project (: follow the link...
redirected now to Maluridae...oops... Cas Liber (talk · contribs) 13:37, 3 August 2013 (UTC)[reply]
  • bearded dragons (a large lizard)—change from plural to singular
removed - let the link explain..... Cas Liber (talk · contribs) 21:05, 3 August 2013 (UTC)[reply]
  • 100 meters. —AE
fixed Cas Liber (talk · contribs) 20:57, 3 August 2013 (UTC)[reply]
  • They are then shoved into the hunter's burrow, where the numb cicada—numb is something of an understatement, "paralysed"
changed to "helpless" - as we already have a paralyse just before... Cas Liber (talk · contribs) 21:09, 3 August 2013 (UTC)[reply]
  • Personally I wouldn't link to publications in refs. I'm particularly unconvinced by redlinks to publications
delinked redlinks Cas Liber (talk · contribs) 21:27, 3 August 2013 (UTC)[reply]
  • ref 1 espšces typo, I think, looks more like Serbian than French. What's "Latr." short for? You can link to the paper
Latr. Pierre André Latreille (genus authority fixed), typo fixed - Cas Liber (talk · contribs) 21:40, 3 August 2013 (UTC)[reply]
  • ref 15 has the journal's publisher, others don't
publisher removed Cas Liber (talk · contribs) 13:39, 3 August 2013 (UTC)[reply]

Comments from Crisco 1492

from the soil - added Cas Liber (talk · contribs) 21:00, 3 August 2013 (UTC)[reply]
  • Shouldn't the bird names all have initial capitals?
names fixed Cas Liber (talk · contribs) 12:44, 4 August 2013 (UTC)[reply]
  • Any parasites?
not that I've seen published..... Cas Liber (talk · contribs) 12:44, 4 August 2013 (UTC)[reply]
  • No mention of them sometimes perching while facing upwards?
not specifically - se can only fllow sources which say "usually face downwards" Cas Liber (talk · contribs) 12:44, 4 August 2013 (UTC)[reply]
  • Behaviour section feels awfully light
can only add what's in source. The information on some organisms can be meagre Cas Liber (talk · contribs) 12:44, 4 August 2013 (UTC)[reply]
I've found an extra source and added a paragraph about their flight inabilities. Please proofread. --99of9 (talk) 04:11, 5 August 2013 (UTC)[reply]
  • re User:Crisco 1492: They used an average which included an arbitrary negative value if the cicada failed to react at all. So I can't give a useful numerical value, but I can say that it's in the middle of the pack compared to the other Australian cicadas they studied. "moderate" was my word for this, but there may be something better. --99of9 (talk) 06:06, 5 August 2013 (UTC)[reply]
  • Support - Read this pre-nom and post this stage of the FAC review. Supporting on the basis of its use of high quality sources, its comprehensiveness and for its clarity of writing. Small niggles I can look after myself. Ceoil (talk) 20:39, 9 August 2013 (UTC)[reply]

Comments. Prose and MoS needs some tweaking; will be back soon with a lit review and check of sources. Sasata (talk) 19:52, 13 August 2013 (UTC)[reply]

  • link authorities: Maxwell Sydney Moulds,Walter Wilson Froggatt, Carl Stål, Frederic Webster Goding, William Lucas Distant
linked once each Cas Liber (talk · contribs) 20:52, 13 August 2013 (UTC)[reply]
  • what is the format for listing the synonyms? It appears to be neither alphabetical nor by year of appearance
It follows the two initial binomials used as they have been transferred through genera and synonymised Cas Liber (talk · contribs) 13:15, 14 August 2013 (UTC)[reply]
  • "It is native to the continent's eastern coastlines; described in 1834 by Ernst Friedrich Germar." fix grammar
fixed Cas Liber (talk · contribs) 13:15, 14 August 2013 (UTC)[reply]
  • "light coloured line" needs hyphen
added Cas Liber (talk · contribs) 03:19, 14 August 2013 (UTC)[reply]
  • link genus earlier, link Aleeta
Genus is now linked on first occurrence (in lead). There is no separate page for Aleeta, it redirects here, as this is the only species in it. 99of9 (talk) 03:45, 14 August 2013 (UTC)[reply]
  • "The male has very distinctive genitalia" (another instance later)
removed x 2 Cas Liber (talk · contribs) 03:24, 14 August 2013 (UTC)[reply]
  • "It is solitary and occurs in low densities." What is "It"? The species, or the male, described in the previous sentence?
the species - fixed Cas Liber (talk · contribs) 03:19, 14 August 2013 (UTC)[reply]
  • "Germar used two specimens now in the Hope Entomological Collections, Oxford, but did not designate a type specimen and their exact locations was not recorded." Used them for what? was->were
  • link genetic distance
linked Cas Liber (talk · contribs) 13:23, 14 August 2013 (UTC)[reply]
  • ensure short-form binomials have non-breaking spaces
added Cas Liber (talk · contribs) 13:23, 14 August 2013 (UTC)[reply]
  • what's an uncal lobe?
an obscure part of the genitalia. Currently at a bit of a loss where to link it to, and explaining what it is is tricky too.... Cas Liber (talk · contribs) 14:22, 14 August 2013 (UTC)[reply]
  • Aleeta's and Tryella's I think it's probably best to avoid using the possessive forms of Latin names, but at the very least, the apostrophe + s should not be italicized
got rid of second, but can't see how to get rid of first without making prose more cumbersome. Have de-italicised the final 's' in any case Cas Liber (talk · contribs) 14:22, 14 August 2013 (UTC)[reply]
  • "…and both the vernacular terms baker and miller were known to be in use by 1860." can we remove "known to be"?
sure. removed Cas Liber (talk · contribs) 05:48, 14 August 2013 (UTC)[reply]
  • "another species of Australian cicada (Altria perulata, now Arunta perulata) which has white "sacks" " which->that (please audit the rest of the article for which/that usage)
umm, a comma and a "which" (all white drummers have white sacs) Cas Liber (talk · contribs) 13:52, 14 August 2013 (UTC)[reply]
  • "With a body length of 2.9 centimetres" no need to spell out the unit here
✔ done 99of9 (talk) 03:31, 14 August 2013 (UTC)[reply]
  • "Their dry mass is around 36.2% of their total bodymass" odd to give the qualifier "around" and then such a accurate figure; perhaps replace "is around" with "is on average"?
done Cas Liber (talk · contribs) 13:23, 14 August 2013 (UTC)[reply]
  • "The female is slightly larger than the male,[3] She has generally similar colourings" fix
tweaked Cas Liber (talk · contribs) 13:23, 14 August 2013 (UTC)[reply]
  • "…at the base of apical cells 2 and 3." how many apical cells are there?
lots - 8 on the forewing and 6 on the hindwing. Cas Liber (talk · contribs) 14:14, 14 August 2013 (UTC)[reply]
  • "continuous zigzag infuscation" infuscation is jargony, is there a more accessible replacement word?
it means darkened bit, which is added by subsequent words. Hence removed and meaning remains same.... Cas Liber (talk · contribs) 14:16, 14 August 2013 (UTC)[reply]
  • discoloration->discolouration
✔ done 99of9 (talk) 03:31, 14 August 2013 (UTC)[reply]
  • link nanometre
✔ done 99of9 (talk) 03:31, 14 August 2013 (UTC)[reply]
  • "The male call can be heard at any time of day" Really? Wouldn't it be more accurate to say something like "The male makes its calls throughout the day"?
hmmm, they start and stop - so I think the way it is wrtten captures that better than your suggestion which more strongly suggests they do it all the time. Cas Liber (talk · contribs) 14:14, 14 August 2013 (UTC)[reply]
  • 7-10 s -> endash, not hyphen
fixed Cas Liber (talk · contribs) 13:57, 14 August 2013 (UTC)[reply]
  • "The tune has been described" Is it accurate to call the insect sounds a "tune"?
tricky this - some books use "song" or "call", both of which sould weirder to me. Too complex to be a "note". Have rejigged so we avoid the word. Cas Liber (talk · contribs) 14:05, 14 August 2013 (UTC)[reply]
  • link Hz, sound frequency, resonance, modulation
✔ done, but I went for resonator rather than resonance 99of9 (talk) 03:31, 14 August 2013 (UTC)[reply]
  • "very wide range of native…"
removed Cas Liber (talk · contribs) 03:24, 14 August 2013 (UTC)[reply]
  • link introduced
done Cas Liber (talk · contribs) 13:42, 14 August 2013 (UTC)[reply]
  • "The metabolic rate over a period of about 6.5 hours during emergence of A. curvicosta is about 1.8 times the resting metabolic rate of the adult." So…? It seems obvious that an actively emerging nymph will be more active than a resting adult.
Is it obvious that it will be a factor of 1.8? Gruelling costume changes like this could be very expensive? Someone thought it was worth studying, so I prefer to keep it. 99of9 (talk) 03:33, 14 August 2013 (UTC)[reply]
  • provide link & Latin binomial for broad-leaved paperbark earlier
done Cas Liber (talk · contribs) 13:42, 14 August 2013 (UTC)[reply]
  • link Sydney
✔ done 99of9 (talk) 03:31, 14 August 2013 (UTC)[reply]
  • "92 day emergence period" needs hyphen
✔ done 99of9 (talk) 03:31, 14 August 2013 (UTC)[reply]
  • is it "South East Queensland" or "South-East Queensland"?
former. offending hyphen removed Cas Liber (talk · contribs) 05:23, 14 August 2013 (UTC)[reply]
  • citations are unnecessarily repeated for the final 4 sentences of the 2nd paragraph of section "Life cycle"
fixed Cas Liber (talk · contribs) 14:05, 14 August 2013 (UTC)[reply]
  • "and mating and egglaying occurs." -> "and mating and egg laying occur."
fixed x 2 Cas Liber (talk · contribs) 03:19, 14 August 2013 (UTC)[reply]
  • what is the Massospora fungus that infects this insect? How does it "affect" the genitalia and abdominal cavity?
I've had a stab at this, but perhaps a specialist on fungal taxa could bluelink it :-). 99of9 (talk) 03:31, 14 August 2013 (UTC)[reply]

Source review Sasata (talk) 19:41, 15 August 2013 (UTC)[reply]

  • ref#2 missing issue#
found it - added Cas Liber (talk · contribs) 21:02, 15 August 2013 (UTC)[reply]
  • retrieval dates not required for online versions of print documents (several instances)
✔ done 99of9 (talk) 02:19, 16 August 2013 (UTC)[reply]
  • The Moulds (1990) source is repeated several times in the references. Could you place this source under a subsection "Bibliography" (or similar) and convert these to short-form citations?
will do this a bit later today. chores to do now done Cas Liber (talk · contribs) 21:12, 15 August 2013 (UTC)[reply]
  • ref#8 needs a date
added Cas Liber (talk · contribs) 21:10, 15 August 2013 (UTC)[reply]
  • article case and page range format are different in ref#9; MacNally given as single word in doi page
fixed Cas Liber (talk · contribs) 21:10, 15 August 2013 (UTC)[reply]
  • page range format ref#15
fixed Cas Liber (talk · contribs) 21:10, 15 August 2013 (UTC)[reply]
  • author format ref#17
fixed Cas Liber (talk · contribs) 21:02, 15 August 2013 (UTC)[reply]
  • case format refs#18, 19
fixed Cas Liber (talk · contribs) 21:10, 15 August 2013 (UTC)[reply]
  • is there a space between author initials (e.g. #17) or not (e.g. #23)
shouldn't be - fixed Cas Liber (talk · contribs) 21:10, 15 August 2013 (UTC)[reply]
  • something's a bit different about the format of book ref#27 (note the comma after the year)
'twas in citation rather than cite book format. fixed Cas Liber (talk · contribs) 21:10, 15 August 2013 (UTC)[reply]
  • ref#31: childrens->children's
apostrophe added Cas Liber (talk · contribs) 21:02, 15 August 2013 (UTC)[reply]

Ok, sources look fine. A lit search of my own failed to turn up any omissions pertaining to WIAFA criteria 1b and 1c. As a final suggestion, it would not be a bad idea to indicate the sources used for the synonyms in the "synonyms_ref" parameter of the taxobox. I support the promotion of this candidacy to FA. Sasata (talk) 03:55, 16 August 2013 (UTC)[reply]

The above discussion is preserved as an archive. Please do not modify it. No further edits should be made to this page.
Retrieved from "https://en.wikipedia.org/w/index.php?title=Wikipedia:Featured_article_candidates/Aleeta_curvicosta/archive1&oldid=1144457237"