User talk:Voeller.chloe/sandbox

-Start by formatting your draft to the wiki article guidelines/the type of coding used. You can do this by copy and pasting the original sections of the article into your sandbox and working on them there. -Try to vary your sentence structure throughout the article, a lot of your sentences start with the word "the." -The last sentence under Casco Tree doesn't make any sense and should be altered. The same goes with your fourth sentence under harvesting. -Under the first section, try to avoid using the word "beautiful" as it doesn't keep the tone of the page neautral. -You have a lot of consistent and important information on each of your sections so far, just make sure to correctly site your sources and don't forget to find pictures for the wikipage as well! Sierrasummers (talk) 02:28, 25 October 2018 (UTC)[reply]

Draft feedback

Hi, Chloe! These are excellent sections to add to this article, and they don't duplicate the information already in it, which is great. As you refine and continue adding to this draft, I wonder if you will find sources about uses for raw chocolate or ones that discuss why it's risen in popularity in recent years (if it even has...are there any sales numbers available from suppliers, I wonder?). It seems like there are still some strong additions that should be easy to find information around. You may also find that you want to update the lead section (or create a lead section--the current article doesn't really differentiate it yet) to reflect the new information you've added.

Other things to consider as you continue working: --getting the references/citations in the way they will appear in the finished article (each statement of fact should be connected to a source, rather than just one source at the end of the paragraph. --proofreading, word choices. I'm not sure if "processed" is quite the right word for what trees do for things that grow on them (first sentence of the cacao tree section), and there are some areas that could use a little more clarity (I'm really curious what the tree's flower cushioning is. Can you say more about this or else link to a Wikipedia page about it?) --there are also some opportunities to add images of the processing steps, or the pod while still on the tree versus the "finished" product.

I look forward to seeing what else you add to this! Nicoleccc (talk) 22:28, 28 October 2018 (UTC)[reply]

Peer review

-In the harvesting section a picture of the tool you're talking about would be helpful to understand it. Also you say, " It is important to damage the flower cushioning of the tree" when I think you mean, it is important not to damage..... -Right now you only have three sources and a lot of information, but I think if you find a couple more sources you could get even more information as well as back up the information that is already there. -You have really good information and a good start, now I think its just a matter of going over the little things like grammar. Really good article! Lynseymae (talk) 04:45, 29 October 2018 (UTC)[reply]