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User talk:Tholin37/sandbox3

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Evaluations

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12/5/2018 Evaluation by HelpMeKnow08

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  • Points: 39/40
  • Grade: 97.5%

Spelling/Grammar

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Meets Standard - First paragraph: add a period after "created," you could add italics for "Schutzhund" just before the definition of "protection dog," and make that one sentence instead of placing a comma. "In the early days...should start a new sentence." You could add to your description about the early days "designed to test breeding stock." What exactly were they testing for (temperament, obedience, etc)? Second paragraph: First sentence--change "created" to "bred", second sentence--Jack of all "trades." Third paragraph: add commas to "People now, after generations of breeding this dog." Add an apostrophe to "The breed's founders," it looks like an extra space needs to be deleted after the word "Berlin," add an 's' after "characteristic" (and that word should end the sentence). Change "lines" to "bloodlines" or some other descriptive word, use lower case 'g' for good nerves. End the sentence with "and trainability," then begin a new sentence with "All of these characteristics" and capitalize Schutzhund to maintain consistency. Fourth paragraph: change to lower case "tracking, obedience, and protection." Don't start sentence with "and," "All this must be done..." sounds better. Add a comma after "however."

Language

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Meets Standard - First paragraph--you could omit the phrase "by far most exciting" as we aren't supposed to influence or make it sound like an opinion. Change "your" dog to "a" dog

Organization

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Meets Standard - The first section header "Munich History of Schutzhund/IPO" looks like it could go under the Geography heading and simply called "Location" with a Subheading 1 font.

Coding

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Nearly Meets Standard - Citations 2, 3, 9, 11, and 12 need the dates (formatting) corrected. Click edit (for the page) and then find your citation within the text that needs to be corrected (look for the red type). You will need to manually edit the date to the format: "5 December 2018".

Validity

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Exceeds Standard

Completion

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Meets Standard - If you are looking for more information to fill out your twenty sources, maybe you could state the highest scores ever received or any kind of records set during the competition. You could also highlight the specific names of popular competitions that garner the most attention (ala the Westminster Dog Show is regarded as the best show dog competition).

Relevance

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Exceeds Standard - Yes! Very good!

Sources

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Meets Standard

Citations

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Meets Standard - Delete space before citation 5 and 7.

References

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Nearly Meets Standard You just need a few more! Keep going! You could probably add a citation after the website URL in the first section.



12/4/2018 Evaluation by Mark Bauhofer

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Mark Bauhofer (talk)

  • Points:
  • Grade:

Spelling/Grammar

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Meets Expectations Grammar and Punctuation looks good.

Language

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exceeds Expectations

Organization

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Exceeds Expectations

Coding

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Exceeds Expectations

Validity

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Exceeds Expectations

Completion

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Exceeds Expectations

Relevance

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Exceeds Expectations

Sources

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Exceeds Expectations

Citations

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Exceeds Expectations

References

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Exceeds Expectations