User talk:Seguam

Welcome!

Hello, Seguam, and welcome to Wikipedia! Thank you for your contributions, especially your edits to Imbongi. I hope you like the place and decide to stay. Here are a few links to pages you might find helpful:

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Please remember to sign your messages on talk pages by typing four tildes (~~~~); this will automatically insert your username and the date. If you need help, check out Wikipedia:Questions, ask me on my talk page, or ask for help on your talk page, and a volunteer should respond shortly. Again, welcome! Leschnei (talk) 23:31, 9 October 2018 (UTC)[reply]

Page on Earth's mantle

Hi Seguam, I've noticed the page on the Earth's mantle is quite awful. Do you think this would be a good one for me to revise? --Geo jt (talk) 21:38, 17 October 2018 (UTC)[reply]

Great idea! --Seguam (talk) 18:46, 25 October 2018 (UTC)[reply]

Peer review?

Hi Seguam, If you like, I can give a peer review to the Magma page. Should I review the actual page or a sandbox page? Thx! I lava editing Wikipedia! Geo jt (talk) 14:29, 15 November 2018 (UTC)[reply]

Thanks Geo jt, that'd be great! Seguam (talk) 19:55, 15 November 2018 (UTC)[reply]

Peer review of Magma page

Hi Seguam, Here is a peer review of the Magma page. I apologize if it seems a little harsh, I am just trying to be helpful.

Overall, the article is a good start. The organization is not awful, but the content is fairly skeletal. Of particular note is the lack of references. There could also be additional internal references (i.e. links to other Wikipedia pages), and it would be a good idea to make sure that the other relevant pages link to this one. My specific comments are as follows:

Lead section

“Partial magma” is apparently an obscure mathematical term. I’d suggest instead of the current redirect line, you might instead just want to refer to the disambiguation page, like how the Magma (algebra) page does.
Include an internal link to igneous rocks
The section mentions of other planets, but this is not expanded in the article, so it shouldn’t be in the lead. Perhaps add a new section at the end for something like “extraterrestrial magmatism”? There’s plenty of magmatism in the solar system, like on the Moon, Venus, Mars, Io, etc.
Otherwise, the lead section is great.

Description section

In general, I don’t know if this whole section is necessary. It seems like a bit of a hodgepodge of bits that don’t really fit into any of the other sections, or bits that would fit into existing sections. For example, there is already a temperature subsection that the temperature sentence could go into. Also, the statement about fractional crystallization should be in the ‘evolution of magmas’ section. Some of the other stuff could also possibly go into the lead. And the statement that magmas form at various different tectonic settings is listed in the “Distribution” line for each magma type. And a content note, magma is not necessarily produced by mantle melting, it could also come from crustal melting.
Include an internal link to oxide
ref 7 to someone’s powerpoint slides? Surely there is a better reference.
“tectonic” could include internal link to plate tectonics

Origins section

I don’t really like the “Mechanisms are discussed further…” sentence, there must be a better way to link to the igneous rock page. Maybe a “see also” section at the end, which includes the link? If there is important content for magmas which is in another page, it should be in this page, no that one.
The second paragraph could be improved a lot. The description of partial melting is not very intuitive and is not backed up with any references.
The Internal link to ‘incompatible elements’ should come at its first usage.
The Geochemical implications subsections has no references at all!
What are the degrees of melting typically for the rock types listed? “small” and “low” are vague. What about other rock types like MORB and OIB? Komatiite?

Evolution section

I agree with the [clarification needed] and [according to whom] comments.
Again, no references!
The last sentence on high degrees of partial melt seems like it belongs in the ‘geochemical implications’ subsection
This section could include a figure of a generic or representative LLD to illustrate differentiation

Migration section

The last sentence in plutonism subsection is really about volcanism, not plutonism.
You don’t need to say “a process known as”
References needed!

Composition, melt structure, and properties section

Could this just be called “properties”? Composition and structure are properties.
The two sentences about viscosity should not be in separate paragraphs.
I don’t know if ultramafic necessarily equals picritic.
What is “Fe-Mg: ~3%th” in Intermediate subsection?
Density subsection: why are these not combined with the characteristics above? This table could be expanded (significantly) horizontally, to include all those other properties (like SiO2 content, viscosity, etc). And finally a reference! but it is to some lecture notes, not a primary or secondary source. I remember a giant table of that nature from my intro geology class.
Composition subsection: references needed! Especially when numbers are being quoted. Also, this section is not really talking much about composition of magmas, except that they sometimes contain volatiles. Thus I am confused about the point of the section.

Best of luck revising! Let me know if you need clarification on anything I've said.

Geo jt (talk) 19:59, 15 November 2018 (UTC)[reply]