User talk:Rayanhus/sandbox

Rayanhus, I really enjoyed reading your post as it was full of interesting facts. I especially found it intriguing that until recently the pillar has remained standing. My biggest suggestion to your post is to add more citations; you can never have too many. This will help strengthen the credibility of your post.I also recommend cutting out the information about the wars, as it is not necessary information regarding the church in my opinion. Great job!Hglass2 (talk) 04:51, 28 November 2017 (UTC)[reply]

Prof. Feedback

Rayan, You've been ambitious in your work expanding this entry, and your research moreover has progressed considerably since the preliminary bibliography. Here are some points to consider as you revise:

Your subheads work well for the content
the sentence "it stands as one of the oldest and remarkable surviving complex churches" needs reworking
the punctuation for the next sentence ("It was constructed...") is incorrect alas, but it looks like it was correct in the original entry so just go back to that version
remember to link to other Wikipedia entries, following the model of the original entry. Because, for example, your entry will link to the entry on Simeon Stylites, that means that you shouldn't include the general background on the saint's life. It might though make sense to talk about the pillar in his life story for example in the context of the remains of the pillar in the church.
the first part of paragraph beginning "A few decades..." would probably fit better under the Architecture section. That is, the content on the Four-Basilica Church should all be brought together in one place in your entry. Basically you have some great material, but it needs to be organized so the info on each part is grouped together.
while you have made headway with your research, there is more to be done. In particular, the mid- nineteenth-century sources are too outdated and need to be replaced with more recent research. Some of the other sources are not peer-reviewed, such as the sound recording. Also, the original entry had some good sources that have now been deleted in your sandbox version, such as Vikan's Pilgrimage Art
the baptistery section is a good addition to the entry, and you cover a lot of important points. Double check though on the phrase "an inquisitive tunnel," I'm guessing some sort of autocorrect messed the text up.
the citation was lost for the UNESCO designation, as well as the other original entry's notes, so make sure to bring those back in.
the section on recent damage to the building in the Syrian-Turkish conflict part is so saddening! You do a great job of laying out all that happened, just needs a citation for your source.

Please touch base if you have any questions, ALMc AMcClanan (talk) 01:39, 2 December 2017 (UTC)AMcClanan[reply]