User talk:Parrot of Doom/Archives/2012/December

The Automobile Association

I'm sure that you, like me, have driven past that AA box at Mere many times. But did you know that it's a fake? As in the original box was destroyed in a traffic accident in 1997, but was recreated by the AA because it had been listed as a Grade II building in 1987? And that the intersection on which it's built was one of the first petrol stations in the UK? I'm gaining a new-found respect for the anarchic way in which the AA took the side of motorists, warning drivers about speed traps ahead by failing to salute for instance. I may do a little piece about AA boxes in tribute, having just been caught by a fucking speed camera in Irlam. Malleus Fatuorum 05:23, 7 December 2012 (UTC)

Ah, you need on the these. I got one after I got caught some years ago and I've managed to avoid getting a fine since (is that tempting fate?) The good thing about them is you don't have to pay anything for updates but they still warn you about most of the cameras. And, when you're out on your own you have a naggng woman with you, just in case you miss the wife :) Richerman (talk) 14:38, 7 December 2012 (UTC)

Back in the 90s' a very dear friend serving in The Swedey tipped me the wink that all of the county's cameras would be inoperative for a month or so. (I'm not able to recall now whether it was for fiscal or technical reasons.) I passed on the int about this window of opportunity to another friend, who contacted me a few weeks later ranting about the ticket she'd just received. I told her she should send it to her old geography teacher and ask him to pay it - the camera was located in Bournemouth. Keri (talk) 15:22, 7 December 2012 (UTC)

Yes I remember reading about the destruction of that box. Fortunately, things like that may not happen in a few years as the A556 is due to be replaced by something much more suitable, located to the west. The locals want the HA to build a connection from the M6 northbound to the M56 eastbound, whereas the HA want to build an entirely new road a few miles to the west. As someone who has to cycle across that road (I will never, ever cycle along it) nearly every day, it cannot come soon enough. I've read that the A556 may be narrowed to two lanes and a 30mph limit imposed. Much better IMO.

As for speed cameras, I've never been caught. I tend to speed only where safe and appropriate, the vans are usually to be found where the limit drops down to 30mph. On the motorways, I very rarely go faster than 75mph. I've found that even though I get home 20 minutes later, I'm far more relaxed doing that speed. Parrot of Doom 20:48, 7 December 2012 (UTC)

Every cyclist (and every driver) should watch this programme that was on BBC the other night. Crazy drivers and crazy cyclists - it was the scariest thing I've seen in years. Richerman (talk) 20:58, 7 December 2012 (UTC)

I'm one of those who film my rides, primarily as an insurance policy but also as a nice way of making little montage videos (I ride through Cheshire). That programme was pretty damn annoying, it presented cycling as some kind of dangerous activity, and it also included footage of illegal alleycat races, presenting them as something normal. They might as well have showed CCTV images of terrorists detonating a bomb, claiming that bombs were an everyday thing. Very, very unbalanced. Parrot of Doom 00:17, 8 December 2012 (UTC)

I was once up to nine penalty points for speeding, but that was in a company car, which always seemed to go faster than my own. I used to live along the A556, and the one thing I never did was to try and turn right into our drive if I was coming from the south; I always took a diversion through Bowdon and came back down the road in the opposite direction, so I could avoid sitting indicating in the outside lane waiting for some prannock to come crashing into the back of me. Malleus Fatuorum 21:07, 7 December 2012 (UTC)

And here's a confession. Shortly after I got my first Jaguar I was driving home from London up the M1, late at night. I had an overwhelming urge to see just how fast the car would go and I put my foot down. When I got to 125mph I bottled out; far too scary. Malleus Fatuorum 21:11, 7 December 2012 (UTC)

145mph on a single carriageway road through Norfolk. I don't do it now, if you want thrills ride a road bike down a hill at 50mph :) Parrot of Doom 00:19, 8 December 2012 (UTC)

I've tried that as well, scared the shit out of me. Never again! Malleus Fatuorum 00:36, 8 December 2012 (UTC)

• I floored the accelerator on an autobahn once and the needle was off the scale — over 150 mph — poop poop! I cycle much more than I drive now but still got my first gatso ticket recently too, alas. Anyway, seeing this reminds me to upload some photos from the Lord Mayor's Show which includes this picture. I've no idea if it's really box 001 or just a facsimile. Warden (talk) 11:55, 13 December 2012 (UTC)

The history of spitting

I decided yesterday to write a little stub on Bridget Bostock, but then I began to wonder what "fasting spittle" was. So I looked it up and decided to write a little article on spittle cures. But what's puzzling me now is why, if spit is so good for us, it's only now footballers who are allowed to spit in public. Why do they do that anyway? Do they do it at home? Malleus Fatuorum 22:33, 12 December 2012 (UTC)

I don't know, but while cycling I blow so many snot rockets in this cold weather that my regular route now has it's very own green cycle lane. Parrot of Doom 23:23, 12 December 2012 (UTC)

That's an image I really am going to have to try very hard to forget. Malleus Fatuorum 23:28, 12 December 2012 (UTC)

Just look at our lovely bridge, that'll sort that out :) We glue it into position this weekend although it won't be open for a few months yet (lots of work left). Next week we're building a Meccano picnic area :) Parrot of Doom 23:35, 12 December 2012 (UTC)

Glue? Shouldn't you have scaled up nuts and bolts? It's a great idea though, full marks to whoever came up with it. Looks you've still got quite a bit to do with clearing out the canal as well. Malleus Fatuorum 00:33, 13 December 2012 (UTC)

I was wondering what was happening with the canal since the recession. Have the plans been scaled back since it all went tits up? And where is the bridge? Richerman (talk) 00:44, 13 December 2012 (UTC)

Well nobody in authority seems to be that interested in restoring it, so we're just doing what we can. The bridge is at the end of Boscow Road in Little Lever. Parrot of Doom 09:42, 13 December 2012 (UTC)

What a shame, after all that talk of spending millions on it and the money it would return in tourism. Maybe one day.... Richerman (talk) 10:25, 13 December 2012 (UTC)

Not tourism so much as regeneration. The canal goes behind Salford Crescent and around the side of the University, to Agecroft. Those areas are shitholes, frankly. Just imagine the improvements a canal would bring - a new cycle route from north Manchester straight into the cities. Birds, fish, nature. Land values. Boats coming up and down the canal, spending money with local businesses as they go. New marinas constructed along the route. To me, it's a no-brainer, but the authorities only know how to waste money. For instance, they recently spent several tens of thousands of pounds erecting a fence down the side of the locks, a fence for a path that isn't even a right of way. We've now blocked that path off as people should never have been walking down it, so the fence is now irrelevant. All they had to do was ask us how to spend money. For what they spent on "improvements" we could have put several miles of canal back into water. Middlewood Locks in Salford was a fantastic start but now it seems the canal has been forgotten again. That's why we're pushing so hard with this new bridge. Parrot of Doom 12:30, 13 December 2012 (UTC)

Have a video of the first day of construction. More to come, if you're interested. I'd greatly appreciate it if you could circulate this amongst anyone you know who's local. Parrot of Doom 17:11, 13 December 2012 (UTC)

Errr...no, that goes to a video about Brighton's Christmas lights :-) Richerman (talk) 18:29, 13 December 2012 (UTC)

Haha well that's a funny video anyway :) Here's the correct link - [1] Parrot of Doom 19:01, 13 December 2012 (UTC)