User talk:Nicoleslaw22
HI NICOLESLAW22!!!
[edit]I missed you when you went to Greece, I am so glad your back! P.S. Africa for Norway!! -amantharose — Preceding unsigned comment added by 68.191.163.184 (talk) 17:37, 25 September 2016 (UTC)
Welcome!
[edit]Hello, Nicoleslaw22, and welcome to Wikipedia! My name is Adam and I work with the Wiki Education Foundation; I help support students who are editing as part of a class assignment.
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If you have any questions, please don't hesitate to contact me on my talk page. Adam (Wiki Ed) (talk) 18:11, 18 September 2016 (UTC)
Advice from a Friend
[edit]Yello Nicoleslaw. I am TutyFruity. "Archaeologists will date any old thing." Don't do that. Good luck!
Comments on Goree
[edit]Hey there! It's Fingers o'toole, I'm commenting on your wikipedia project article. It's looking good so far, It could maybe use a few more sources but I'm sure those will come as the Archaeology section expands. Also your section could maybe use a few subheadings? Just to break up the information a little. also I think that the one small sentence on the Rue Des Dungeons could use some expanding, maybe into it's own paragraph. Otherwise the information looks great and it's well put together. Fingers o'toole (talk) 19:21, 15 November 2016 (UTC)
Overall, there is a lot of great content and details in the article and you are off to a great start. However, I do have a couple concerns. Although I do not know which were your additions, there are some minor issues with word confusion, punctuation and word choice at conjunctions, unnecessary wording, and capitalization, which can easily be addressed. I also have some suggestions about the structure. However, my greatest concern is about the ethos of the article, involving the lack of citations.
Since this is an encyclopedic article and not associated with any specific discipline, you should add more citations to make your content more credible, because it cannot necessarily be labeled as common knowledge pertaining to a discipline. There is one sentence with quotations that should be cited, “After the decline of the slave trade from Senegal in the 1770s and 1780s, the town became an important port for the shipment of peanuts, peanut oil, gum arabic, ivory, and other products of the "legitimate" trade.” This sentence should either have a citation added or be erased (Arabic should also be capitalized). Throughout the article there are numerous occurrences of statistical figures, particularly census data, which should either be cited or erased. Lastly, use citations if you make references to document. E.g. “According to census records obtained from the 18th century, the majority of enslaved population fell under the category of domestic slaves, rather than slaves to be exported.”
I believe the structure of the article may also benefit with the section “History and Slave Trade” being divided into two separate sections or possibly incorporating the content involving the sites history that seems irrelevant to Slavery with the administrative section, since much of it is related. Otherwise, some of the content seems out of place. I would also add this to the introduction, “Gorée is a small island 900 metres (3,000 ft) in length and 350 metres (1,150 ft) in width sheltered by the Cap-Vert Peninsula.”
Make sure you capitalize proper nouns, such as Arabic as I mention before and “professor of African history.”
Some sections are also a bit wordy and can be condensed or merged. E.g. “After the French gained control in 1677, the island remained continuously French until 1960. There were brief periods of British occupation during the various wars fought by France and Britain. In 1960 Senegal was granted independence” or “(the modern Haiti).” Also in the introduction Goree is introduced as an island and as being “at sea,” which is redundant.
Also, add commas before the conjunction, “but” and add an “and” in this section, “; palais du Government (Government Palace).”
Additionally, I do not understand how the conclusion was deduced within this sentence, “Quartier Bambara was a segregated settlement, which suggests domestic slavery rather than exportation.”
Sorry about sounding like a killjoy, but as I stated earlier, there is great information in the article and it does look great. I just wanted to point out some minor edits and provide examples so they could be located using the search key, in addition to my concern over the use citations. Please, don't hold back while reviewing my article.BBTouag25 (talk) 02:45, 16 November 2016 (UTC)
Article feedback
[edit]Excellent work on your additions to the Gorée article. I just wanted to note that the citations you added to the article should provide more information, as some omit the names of authors of publishers. The training module Sources and Citations can give you more information about citations and citation format. Please let me know if you have any questions. Rob (Wiki Ed) (talk) 23:10, 23 November 2016 (UTC)