User talk:Mwpiper

This user is a student editor in American_University/Women,_Politics_and_Political_Leadership_(Spring_2018) .

Welcome!

Hello, Mwpiper, and welcome to Wikipedia! My name is Shalor and I work with the Wiki Education Foundation; I help support students who are editing as part of a class assignment.

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If you have any questions, please don't hesitate to contact me on my talk page. Shalor (Wiki Ed) (talk) 15:56, 17 January 2018 (UTC)[reply]

Hello! I'm from the intertwine chat and just wanted to say hi! Luminous744 (talk) 21:21, 10 February 2018 (UTC)[reply]

Here, have a free cookie! Luminous744 (talk) 21:23, 10 February 2018 (UTC)[reply]

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https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/User:Mwpiper — Preceding unsigned comment added by MountainFoot (talk • contribs) 21:25, 10 February 2018 (UTC)[reply]

Notes

Hi! I wanted to leave you some notes. The draft looks good, but you need to be careful about tone. Avoid phrasing like "Her commitment to feminism was born", as this can come across as marketing/promotional speak. A good alternative may be something like "She began showing an interest in feminism after her father reminded her that girls do not play in the NHL.". I'd also avoid italicizing words to emphasize a point, as this can be seen as a form of personal opinion. The article could also use some more sourcing, but overall this looks good. Shalor (Wiki Ed) (talk) 18:18, 30 March 2018 (UTC)[reply]