User talk:Morganvr12/sandbox
In order to contribute & edit the "And Tango Makes Three" Wikipedia page, I plan on creating a section titled "Value in Classrooms" to acknowledge literary criticisms of the book. Also, I plan on expanding upon the Missouri case of censorship and the Chico case of non-censorship. Morganvr12 (talk) 04:08, 14 November 2016 (UTC)
Bibliography
[edit]Here is my bibliography of sources that will help me achieve my plan:
Bailey, Aaron. "Tango Takes a Trip Around - the World - Children's Book Moved to Children's Nonfiction Section." St.Joseph News-Press (MO)Mar 16 2006. Web. Chico Enterprise-Record. "Letter: Book Ban would be Dangerous Precedent." Chico Enterprise-Record (Chico, CA)Oct 25 2008. Web. CHRIS GULLICK, -. S. W. "Children's Book Remains on Shelves." Chico Enterprise-Record (Chico, CA)Nov 13 2008. Web. Harvey, Jennifer. "And Tango Makes Three: Introducing Family Diversity to Children." Children & Libraries 11.3 (2013): 27-33. ProQuest. Web. 13 Nov. 2016. JILL SEDERSTROM, Special to,The Star. "NKC Board Votes to Keep Book in School Libraries." Kansas City Star, The (MO): NO4. Dec 23 2009. Web. — Preceding unsigned comment added by Morganvr12 (talk • contribs) 04:09, 14 November 2016 (UTC)
Comments
[edit]Morgan-
Your paragraphs are well written. Also, I thought that you provided some very insightful quotes. I've provided a few suggestions below:
• The title of the book should be italicized • 2nd line: these two penguins fathered an egg • Be more specific when talking about the Missouri case-->mention the school and year • Did the Missouri case take place in an elementary school? • For the California case, make sure that it is clear that you are talking about a different case • Give a year for the California case • Did the California case take place in an elementary school • Subsequent lessons add • Who is Jennifer Harvey? Provide a brief description as to who she is • Make it clear that Justin Richardson is the author of And Tango Makes Three
Overall, make sure it is clear when and where the cases took place. Also, give a brief description of the people you are quoting. Great job! Meredithtibbals (talk) 15:41, 21 November 2016 (UTC)Meredithtibbals
Comments from Zac
[edit]Section 1: Morgan, I think this section was written well. I think the first part of the article might not be necessary when adding it right into the actual article. Secondly, be careful with using some value judgment phrases. I see what you are trying to get at, so I would just ensure that there are signal phrases in the appropriate locations. I really liked your use of quotes here to. Check my more specific fixes and comments via email!
Section 2: This is well written, but I think you are missing the other side here. You have people explaining the value of the book, but it would be most beneficial to add another side explaining why the book could be seen as harmful to a child’s growth. Also I would be more specific with exactly what you mean by “value”. Thirdly, I would split this into 3 paragraphs: 1) intro, 2) benefits of books 3) harmful things of the book. Check my email for more specific edits! Thanks.