User talk:Mamartin3

Feedback on sandbox article

Hi! I'm the content expert for your class and your professor asked me to give you some feedback on User:Mamartin3/sandbox.

It looks like you've definitely done your research, however at the same time what you have so far reads like an academic paper. (User:Tokyogirl79/Academic papers vs Wikipedia articles) It would be a good academic paper to be sure, but it doesn't fit the style and tone of an encyclopedia article. You also need to make sure that you cite your sourcing using in-line citations, per Wikipedia's WP:MoS.

My advice to you would be to work on getting this to read more like an encyclopedia article and fixing the sourcing. You have a good start to pull from. Shalor (Wiki Ed) (talk) 06:36, 3 May 2017 (UTC)[reply]

Hi! I'm following up with your edits. The article still reads like an academic paper, but you've done a lot with the editing so far. If you want some help with writing, drop me a note on my talk page and I can see what I can do. Shalor (Wiki Ed) (talk) 05:16, 10 May 2017 (UTC)[reply]