User talk:Lyang82/Lavinia dock

I have left my feedback on the article draft here.

Overall, great work!

Regards,

Neil Hooloomann Nhooloo1 (talk) 03:21, 4 April 2020 (UTC)nhooloo1[reply]

MH final comments

This article is looking very good! Before you submit your final draft (due May 8), I'd suggest changing the formatting a bit to make the look more consistent throughout. In the first section, you've separated nearly every line into a separate paragraph - consider looking for ones you can merge into more cohesive blocks of text. Keep the citations as they are, though, as they're just right!

I'm not quite sure what's going on with the books/bibliography sections at the bottom - if you intend one of them to be books by her and the other to be books about her, make that clear. In addition, please add links to public-domain versions of her books (archive.org is an excellent resource for out-of-copyright works, and it has some of hers). — Preceding unsigned comment added by M.hin.ck (talk • contribs) 17:20, 28 April 2020 (UTC)[reply]

MH comments

This article is looking much improved! Keep the following in mind as you revise your next draft:

1. Overall, you've done a very nice job with crosslinking with other Wikipedia articles, but go through and make sure you've got all the ones that would be potentially useful for the reader's reference (there is a 1909 shirtwaist strike article, for instance).

2. Make sure that you're citing everything thoroughly, particularly where you refer to her beliefs or those of others. What's the source, for instance, for your statement that 'professionalization depended on their distance from these problems'? If it's one of the ones given at the end of the paragraph, move it up - both here and in your own work, the source for each fact should be easily identifiable.

3. Think about how you could make the article more user-friendly for people doing more research on Dock. Are any of her books available in the public domain, for instance? If so, linking to them could be a useful activity. As you refine the article, use this section and your 'External Links' section as a way to help future researchers.

4. Consider adding another image - if you can find one from her time at Hopkins, this could be a good way of emphasizing the connection, but any image would be a good addition. If you have any copyright questions, don't hesitate to email me!

Also, please post a comment to the Talk page of the original article explaining that you're drafting a new version of this article for a WikiEducation class, providing a short summary of the changes you've made (dividing it into sections, adding information, etc.) so that when you begin moving this across in a couple of weeks, it won't come as a surprise.

I also see that one of your peer reviews hasn't been completed yet; if you would like some more edits, just email me and I'll provide a marked-up copy. Read the one you have and continue to revise in the sandbox (all your old drafts are saved automatically). Keep up the good work! — Preceding unsigned comment added by M.hin.ck (talk • contribs) 02:43, 5 April 2020 (UTC)[reply]