User talk:Laurenensworth/sandbox
Comments from Rosie: Excellent choice - I had no idea that the page for Lighthouse Park was so badly in need of improvement. Rosieredfield (talk) 00:31, 6 February 2017 (UTC)
Comments from Wasin
[edit]Peer review for the page as of 20:07, 7 March 2017.
For the table of content, instead of saying “1. Lighthouse Park”, 1. Should just start with “History” because the title page is going to say Lighthouse Park so it would make organization better by have 1. 2. 3. Instead of 1. And 1.1, 1.2, 1.3.
I understand that in your “Flora” section, Douglas Fir and Western Redcedar are native species, however it may not be clear to other readers, so specifying what you’re about to talk about will help with organization and flow. Under “Douglas Fir (Pseudotsuga menziesii)”, you wrote “When the first European settlers arrived in Vancouver, they were amazed by the scale of the 1,000 year old Douglas fir trees.” This is poorly worded because you’re giving emotions to the first European settlers which is unnecessary.
The references are nice and useful. Under the “Pets” section, there is no reference but I understand that it would be hard to find reference for it so I’m not sure if you should include it in your page. Once you integrate your page with other pages, especially for “Community” as you said you would, it would look very nice.
Wasynical (talk) 03:08, 9 March 2017 (UTC)
Note from Rosie: Wikipedia time stamps edits in UTC time, which is 8 hr ahead of our time. So any edits made before 8:00 am March 8 were not late. Rosieredfield (talk) 21:45, 23 March 2017 (UTC)
Comments from Adelaida
[edit]Great page! Lots of helpful links throughout. Some information I think that you can add in the viewpoints section is how long it takes for the average person to get to the different viewpoints, and how long the distance for each is. Also, if you can find information on it, it would be nice to know about the differences in terrains to each viewpoint - is it steep hills? Steps? Relatively flat? Maintained well? As a reader, I might also be wondering if West Beach is rocky or sandy. You mentioned that Stearman beach is good to go for a walk through, but would it also be good for picnics and lounging around on? In the pets section, what trails exactly are dogs permitted on? You also mentioned that there is shopping available in the near by community, but under shops there was just a bakery and a tea house listed; are there other types of shopping available too? I also think some information (transit, driving instructions, parking availability) on how to get to the park would be good. — Preceding unsigned comment added by Adelaida1994 (talk • contribs) 00:20, 19 March 2017 (UTC)
Comments from Tamara
[edit]1. Organisation and content: Overall, the layout of your page is logical, informative and very aesthetic! In terms of content, I know that the park is primarily used for hiking but some parks have picnic/lunch tables - is this the case for the Lighthouse Park? Under 'Hiking Trails' I would also add that along with beginner hikers, tourists frequently visit Lighthouse park too. 2. External Links to your page - your page could link to the wikipedia page for Vancouver: Ecology Section >> Sports and Recreation. 3.Writing Quality - review the correct use of single and double quotation marks eg refer to 'wear-and-tear' or 'particular friend'. Also you could briefly explain what 'attached keepers dwelling' means - are keepers the people who maintain the park and lighthouse?
Review Grade: 4
Comments by Frankie
[edit]This Wikipedia article was very thorough and presented the topic ideas in a logical order with appropriate section headings. The infobox at the top-right of the page seems to be lacking some information compared to other pages on Vancouver parks. The infobox can be improved by the addition of the 'type' of park; 'geotagging' the location of Lighthouse Park with coordinates and a small map of its location in West Vancouver; and linking the existing West Vancouver Wikipedia page. A caption needs to be added for the picture of the Douglas Fir. The author did a thorough job at providing information about the hiking trails and viewpoints available at Lighthouse Park, and stated that they intend to incorporate pictures and a map of these areas. I think this would be a wonderful addition to those sections, a trail map such as one from https://westvancouver.ca/sites/default/files/dwv/assets/parks-rec/docs/Trail-Maps/LHP_Hiking_Trail_Map.pdf could be linked as an external reference or be adapted for use of this Wikipedia page. Additionally, the location of Lighthouse Park is in West Vancouver and can be considered more suburban as it is near the Sea-to-Sky Highway. Due to its unique geographical location, yet ease of accesses though the Highway 99, the addition of a directions section to drive to Lighthouse Park may be helpful. Furthermore, in response to Adelaida's question about dog permitted trails, according to https://westvancouver.ca/sites/default/files/dwv/assets/home-building-property/docs/pets-wildlife-environment/Abbie%27sGuideToWestVan.pdf it appears that all dogs are permitted to be off-leash on Lighthouse Park trails. This external source could be added as a reference under the "Pets" section. Overall, the writing quality, organization, and integration of this Wikipedia page is great. — Preceding unsigned comment added by F.law (talk • contribs) 08:28, 21 March 2017 (UTC)
Comments from Rosie
[edit]The peer reviewers' suggestions are good, but lots of other improvements can also be made (in no particular order):
- There is no Lead section (introduction)
- Spelling error: 'forrest'
- Lighthouse Park is the name of the park. Point Atkinson is the name of the point of land where the lighthouse is.
- Give some history of the park, not just of the lighthouse.
- Give information about how to get to the park.
- Go to the park and take some pictures! A photo of the entrance sign would be helpful to accompany the directions.
- The point was named for Captain Vancouver's friend, not discovered for him. (I would not mention the 'particular friend' factoid.)
- You really must have a map showing the park's location, and you should also have a map of the trails and viewpoints within the park.
- I don't think the 'Community' section is particularly useful. You could just mention that the park is in a residential neighbourhood, and that the nearest commercial neighbourhoods are Ambleside and Horseshoe Bay (if that's correct).
- Horseshoe Bay is not 'very close' to the park. If you're going to mention it, you should also mention the nearby Whytecliff Park.
- What about other flora and fauna? The park has lots of species of trees, other native plants, interesting birds...
- 'in order to benefit Lighthouse Park' isn't a very helpful explanation for why the vegetation is being replaced.
- The park has a cluster of old wooden buildings, separate from the lighthouse keeper's (note apostrophe) house. I think they may be used for summer day-camp programs, maybe run by the City of West Vancouver.
Rosieredfield (talk) 19:05, 23 March 2017 (UTC)
Comments from Ruth
[edit]Just a couple of extra things:
- Yes, a lead section is needed. See other Wikipedia pages for examples
- Correct the sections under pets to "Dogs are permitted only on certain trails to ensure the safety of the dogs as well as other users"
- Yes, Rosie is right. Include details of how to get there i.e. can you get a busy from downtown Vancouver?
- Include the coordinates of the park in the info box