User talk:Jakobin99

Welcome!

Hello, Jakobin99, and welcome to Wikipedia! My name is Ian and I work with Wiki Education; I help support students who are editing as part of a class assignment.

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If you have any questions, please don't hesitate to contact me on my talk page. Ian (Wiki Ed) (talk) 19:06, 28 August 2024 (UTC)

Your draft

Hi. I moved your draft back to your sandbox because it isn't ready of mainspace yet. I recommend that you start by having a look at pages 7-9 in the Editing Wikipedia brochure (linked here) to get a sense of what article layout should be like.

Wikipedia:WikiProject Tropical cyclones has a lot of resources for writing about cyclones, including General guidelines, Article guidelines, and a Style guide. These will be very helpful for your going forward.

In addition, you need to make sure you are writing in a style that's appropriate for Wikipedia. For example, you wrote

The 1872 Zanzibar hurricane was not only a weather event of an extraordinarily rare type, but also a transformative social, political, and economic event in Zanzibar and its environs, and consequently in the world as a whole.

• "extraordinarily rare type"
  • It's best to avoid words like "extraordinary" except in direct quotes. It just isn't neutral language.
• "transformative social, political, and economic event"
  • What does "transformative" mean? You can (and should) say how it changed Zanzibar, you should be specific, you can even attribute the opinion that it was transformative to someone who expressed that opinion, but don't just say it like that. As is, it manages to be both vague filler and feels promotional.
• " and consequently in the world as a whole."
  • Never say something like that. Never call something "transformative...to the world as a whole". You can say how it set off a chain of events, saying it like this is just important-sounding fluff.

Ian (Wiki Ed) (talk) 16:21, 9 December 2024 (UTC)

Ian,

Thanks for your feedback. I've cleaned up some of the phraseology-- unfortunately, this is an older tropical storm, so much of the information that would normally be there for a tropical storm page is difficult to come by. Is there anything else you suggest I do before this is in a condition to be published? Jakobin99 (talk) 04:23, 10 December 2024 (UTC)