User talk:Hyungseoklee
| This user is a student editor in University_of_California_Berkeley/Development_and_the_Environment_(Fall_2017) . |
Sam's Peer Review
[edit]The first paragraph from the original article was a bit vague, so I like how you clarified it. It also had no sources, and the ones you found and linked appear credible. The list of environmental issues facing Azerbaijan it is well organized and concise. I think each issue could use a little more development in your final draft. The intro could still use some more clarification, what are the state programs and political movements involved? What are the European law requirements? I like where you are going with your connection between the Soviet Union, development, and the environment. What makes the Azerbaijan situation unique? The segment you included about petroleum answers this question. Your writing tone is perfect for a wikipedia's specifications. Your conclusion brings up a relationship between political instability and environmental hazard. This is especially interesting to me. The Soviet Union fell apart a long time ago, yet the environmental effects remain. This seems to be what makes Azerbaijan stand out.
Sadondakis (talk) 20:12, 22 November 2017 (UTC) Sadondakis (talk) 21:06, 22 November 2017 (UTC)
Caleb's Peer Review
[edit]I like how you edited basically the entire article, pulling from the original source and expanding on the content. I thought that it was written in a very concise way, one that was easily understandable and very informative. I think that the conclusion could be written in a way that makes it sound more encyclopedic, because to me it seems like it was written in essay format instead. I particularly liked the section, "Local Health is Affected Most," but I think the final title could be a little simpler, in accordance to Wikipedia standards.