User talk:Hoitingwu/sandbox

TA Comments:

In-text citations: one

Professional tone: yes

Paraphrasing real science: yes

Grammar and spelling: minor grammar issues such as missing letters (… the atomic unit of energy E_h can be derived a[s]). Also, some sentences are not fitting to a scientific article. Sentences like “Although chemists are not generally interested studying the helium atom, but it can illustrate the techniques used for more complex atoms” should be revised both for grammar and content. Try something like “The helium atom, a relatively simple quantum system, can be used to illustrate the techniques used for more complex atoms.”

Links to other wiki articles: no

Score: 14/20

Peer Review:

Wow, this is a really good page!

Some things to improve/change:

1. The second sentence is good, but there are two typos: "Although chemists are not generally interested [in] studying the helium atom, [delete 'but'] it can illustrate the techniques used for more complex atoms."
2. Change "Atomic unit" to "The atomic unit" in the first line of the second paragraph.
3. Typo: "the atomic unit of energy E_h can be derived [as]," and for some reason the E_h isn't showing up as a subscript
4. " the calculated energies [do] change"

All the math and concepts seems solid, there are mainly just some grammar errors! You have a good factual tone, and your section does a good job summarizing difficult concepts. --SandraZarmer (talk) 05:42, 23 November 2016 (UTC)[reply]

ZARMER, SANDRA Peer Review Score: 20/20