User talk:Emilioluna/sandbox
Peer Review
[edit]Your section is interesting and informative and I don't see any unbalanced perspectives. These suggestions are just the first things that popped into my head!
Your lead is a great introduction and flows in the right direction. I'm not sure how you would do this, but it might be smoother to break it up into a couple sentences just because there are a lot of commas.
When you say "...British dominion was favourable to the alternatives," you could specify and say "...British dominion was favourable to the alternative French or American rule" to make it clearer.
I would add a "the" to this sentence: "...disdain for the French Revolution because they had seen it attack both the aristocracy..."
You use "meanwhile" a couple sentences later, so I would delete it from this sentence: "The common habitant, though opposed to British rule, did not see..."
You could delete "a" here: "...many in Québec were wrought with distaste for their neighbours..."
I would start a new paragraph using this sentence: "Meanwhile, the British-Canadian opinion of their French-speaking counterparts was one of distrust..."
Delete "gave" here: "...the Canadian Constitution treated the Québécois with more..."
You can delete "largely from these attacks" here because you say it in the preceding clause: "...moved the population of Lower Canada; the impending war became an opportunity..."
This section could come off a little biased: "Governor Prevost's attempt to claim credit for the victory of Charles de Salaberry and his voltigeurs at the Battle of Châteguay aside, the..." → To make it simpler you could say: "Though Governor Prevost attempted to claim credit for the victory of Charles de Salaberry and his voltigeurs at the Battle of Châteguay, the..." Then again, that wasn't really changing anything so it's really up to you.
You could add "but" here: "...not only bolstered nationalist sentiment in Québec, but it also satiated the fears..."
These changes are completely up to you! Cvanderwood (talk) 19:53, 8 April 2018 (UTC)