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User talk:Eliasd06/sandbox

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Feedback

[edit]

@Eliasd06: Nice start on an article. I had a few pieces of feedback and suggestons:

  • The article needs a lede that should provide the basic facts.
  • As I mentioned in class, focus on a neutral encyclopedic tone. The current version reads a little too narratively (e.g., "This did not stop Man vs Food..."). In your case, I don't get the strong sense that article is non-neutral but it should be more factual than narrative.
  • Citations are good and (IMHO) establish notability. That said, it might be seen as a little borderline by some. mynorthwest.com is KIRO which is definitely a great source. Anything in the Seattle Times? The Stranger (newspaper)? Seattle Weekly?
  • More a nice-to-have but an infobox would be great!

mako 17:37, 20 October 2016 (UTC)[reply]