User talk:Dedoton4
This user is a student editor in Yale/Issues_in_Medicine__and_Public_Health_(Fall,_2017) . |
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Messages
[edit]Hi Dedoton4! This is your classmate, Bunnydew15. I am interested in medicine and public health like you, and I look forward to collaborating with you on future projects! Bunnydew15 (talk) 06:17, 11 October 2017 (UTC)
- Man I really hopes this works. Hi Dedoton4. My name is JD Johns. I hope that you're just as excited to be on wikipedia as I am. You wouldn't believe how long it took me to figure this thing out. JD Johns (talk) 01:46, 12 October 2017 (UTC)
- Hi Dedoton4! This is TM Mehta, and I am really excited to be in class with you. I can't wait to start doing research and working on our wikipedia articles. Alextm21 (talk) 15:49, 12 October 2017 (UTC)
It's me! iimph2017! (Iimph2017 (talk) 17:49, 24 October 2017 (UTC))
Oh HAYY! Eqw55 (talk) 17:50, 24 October 2017 (UTC)
Welcome!
[edit]Hello, Dedoton4, and welcome to Wikipedia! My name is Ian and I work with the Wiki Education Foundation; I help support students who are editing as part of a class assignment.
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If you have any questions, please don't hesitate to contact me on my talk page. Ian (Wiki Ed) (talk) 19:30, 24 October 2017 (UTC)
Peer Edit
[edit]I think your "Controversy" section is well thought out, and gives the reader a comprehensive overview of the law suit. As an individual who did not fully grasp the situation, I think this section was very helpful. Before you delve into the controversy, however, I think you should add more into the "History" section of the article. I feel that you use the single long quote to explain the entire history of Joe Camel. Do some more searching about the development of the caricature. Analyze the quote a little more, while remaining objective, of course. Its well done though! — Preceding unsigned comment added by Yalie123 (talk • contribs) 01:09, 14 November 2017 (UTC)
Feedback
[edit]Nice work on your draft. I think the flow is fine. From a formatting standpoint, bear in mind that section headers should use sentence capitalization - only the first word of the title, and proper nouns, should be capitalized. It would also be helpful to add more links to other articles. Terms that are likely to be unfamiliar to the average reader should be linked the first time they appear in the article.
You need to be a bit more consistent with your sourcing. References should appear immediately after the statements they support. There should be a minimum of one reference per paragraph, and there shouldn’t be any text after the last reference in a paragraph. You should also include a reference for the table.
Finally, there's the Impact of marketing section. Since it isn't specific to Joe Camel, I think you should probably just include a mention of it in the text, some place relevant, and links to the Tobacco advertising article. If you want to create a section in this article, you need to have something that's specific to the article topic. Ian (Wiki Ed) (talk) 20:56, 14 November 2017 (UTC)
Peer Review
[edit]ey
I very much so enjoyed reading your article. I think what I talked about in terms of continuing to hammer down on the cultural aspect is very important. In terms of what you have now however, I do believe that it is very strong. it simply is formatting that. Like said in a previous review, the History standpoint you really want to make sure is very developed. I think the more detail the better in terms of how they were able to survey the public and culture of the United States at the time to pick an image or icon that would have such a lasting effect.
JD Johns (talk) 02:55, 15 November 2017 (UTC)
Response to Peer Review
[edit]Hey JD johns! This is actually exactly along the lines of what I was thinking I should add more a social focus, especially since most of the information that I currently have relates to the internal ways Joe Camel was made available to the public. In addition, since my article focuses mainly on the global health side of things, I think it would a good idea to include something about the social side anyway (and general public perception). It's been a little challenging finding some articles that address this specifically, but I will continue looking around.
16:16, 16 November 2017 (UTC)
Speedy deletion nomination of Yale Freshman Olympics
[edit]Hello, and welcome to Wikipedia. Although everyone is welcome to contribute to Wikipedia, introducing inappropriate pages, such as Yale Freshman Olympics, is not in accordance with our policies. If you would like to experiment, please use the sandbox. Under section G3 of the criteria for speedy deletion, the page has been nominated for deletion.
If you think this page should not be deleted for this reason, you may contest the nomination by visiting the page and clicking the button labelled "Contest this speedy deletion". This will give you the opportunity to explain why you believe the page should not be deleted. However, be aware that once a page is tagged for speedy deletion, it may be deleted without delay. Please do not remove the speedy deletion tag from the page yourself, but do not hesitate to add information in line with Wikipedia's policies and guidelines. HickoryOughtShirt?4 (talk) 05:50, 2 July 2018 (UTC)