User talk:David Spart/Chabad Messianism

Review by User:Jayvdb

I'll keep adding bits here as I make my way though the article.

Intro

Many followers of Chabad believe..
- The use of the word many needs to be justified to toned down John Vandenberg 03:57, 4 March 2007 (UTC)[reply]
..their late leader Rabbi Menachem Mendel Schneerson is the Messiah and return from the dead to lead the Jews out of exile and back to Jerusalem.
- Im not very knowledgeable in this area, but the "and return from the dead" part strikes me as odd. Half of my issue with it is that it doesnt make it clear which of these two are meant (or both):

He is to return from the dead at some time in the future
He is someone else who returned from the dead

The sentence structure needs a bit of work, and I need to do some more research. John Vandenberg 03:57, 4 March 2007 (UTC)[reply]

The link to Messiah should be to Jewish Messiah. John Vandenberg 03:57, 4 March 2007 (UTC)[reply]

- I added a source for the "many". "Some" is no better, and "most" it probably true and can be sourced in numerous papers - but I think "many" is more NPOV.
- "it shuold read "will return".
- Fixed the link.
- Grateful for your continued feedback. David Spart 16:37, 4 March 2007 (UTC)[reply]

- - If you can find good sources that most then it isnt POV to say most. JoshuaZ 16:39, 4 March 2007 (UTC)[reply]

Looks good to me.

I may have some minor comments later, but a quick glance through makes it look ready to move to mainspace. JoshuaZ 07:15, 4 March 2007 (UTC)[reply]

Initial comments

Aside from the spelling errors, in an article as controversial as this practically every sentence will need referencing. I think you'd have to double the references at least before you would be able to make any headway against opposition from Lubavitch editors. As a simple example, both of these sentences would required attribution Schneerson's death lead to a rethinking of the theology of messianism within Chabad. While the funeral was attended by a few dozen extreme messianists who danced throughout the procession and argued that his death was a required part of the process of him returning as Messiah - most messianists were subdued. Those are just two examples of many. Jayjg ^(talk) 16:52, 4 March 2007 (UTC)[reply]