User talk:Blender64/Felix Moos

I'm reviewing this article based on how it currently appears, without any editing by anyone else. I'll be making some suggested edits in order to improve the article before it goes into Wikipedia mainspace. Hoopes (talk) 17:51, 20 October 2014 (UTC)[reply]

Among the edits that would improve the overall quality of the article would be the addition of more hyperlinks to existing articles. For example, at present the opening summary paragraph has no hyperlinks. Inclusion of these would assist readers with identifying the main contributions of Prof. Moos through reference to other articles. The first paragraph of the article should provide an overall summary in such a way that it provides a preview of the rest of the article.Hoopes (talk) 17:56, 20 October 2014 (UTC)[reply]

Please note that I have added a number of hyperlinks to the article, including ones added in the list of awards. I think the list of publications should be re-formatted to a standard Wikipedia bibliography form, with hyperlinks to items that are available online.Hoopes (talk) 18:45, 20 October 2014 (UTC)[reply]

The information about education should be moved to a single section and reformatted in narrative, biographical form. To it, you should add additional information about Moos' teaching at the Naval War College and other such institutions. The article should also mention his specific activities, including the service on Guam in 1975 to evacuate Vietnamese refugees (discussed in an article co-authored with George Stephen Morrison that was distributed in class and which should be specifically cited. Moos' personal associations with William J. Crowe and Stansfield Turner.Hoopes (talk) 18:45, 20 October 2014 (UTC)[reply]

I'm concerned that your heavy reliance on personal communication references may be a problem for editors when this article goes into Wikipedia mainspace. Can you find additional published references--either hardcopy or online ones--that provide additional information about Prof. Moos' education and service? It is great that you got personal leads from him, but it should be possible to document these points with other published information.Hoopes (talk) 18:45, 20 October 2014 (UTC)[reply]