User talk:Beccalouj
This user is a student editor in MIT/Main_Group_Chemistry_(Fall_2018) . |
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[edit]Hello, Beccalouj, and welcome to Wikipedia! My name is Ian and I work with the Wiki Education Foundation; I help support students who are editing as part of a class assignment.
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If you have any questions, please don't hesitate to contact me on my talk page. Ian (Wiki Ed) (talk) 16:07, 17 September 2018 (UTC)
Peer review on "Phosphaethynolate"
[edit]Overall, the Wikipage "phosphaethynolate" presents a great variety of interesting information in a highly well-organized fashion. In particular, the incorporation of different types of calculations, such as HOMO/LUMO diagrams, stacked Laplacian electron density graph and contour plot of electron density, significantly enriched the presentation of this Wikipage. The ChemDraw figures and data tables served as very informative supplements to the discussions in text. I particularly appreciate the color coding in the ChemDraw figures, which made them easy to follow. Below, I will focus on discussing some suggestions for further polishing this page:
• Regarding the links to other Wiki pages: I would recommend incorporating more links for concepts that may be unfamiliar for a general audience (such as "X-ray crystallography", "infra-red spectroscopy", "dimethoxyethane", "congener", "nucleophilicity", "Brönsted base", etc). Links serve to aid readers when they run into unfamiliar concepts, thus it would be more helpful to focus on creating links for technical concepts like the ones I listed above, instead of some of the relatively basic terminologies (such as "synthesis", "chemical formula" etc). In addition, in the "Attack by O" section, please make sure to link "hard" to the "HSAB theory" Wikipage, as this adjective can be particularly confusing in the context for readers who are not familiar with the HSAB theory.
• Regarding formatting: Consistency throughout the Wikipage can be improved by making the ChemDraw figures roughly uniform in size-please note that Figure 5 is much smaller than the rest of the ChemDraw figures. In addition, Figure 6 is also a bit too small, making the labeling on the axis difficult to read.
• Regarding the language usage: I wouldn't recommend using relatively informal languages such as "as you vary E" (Varying E section, sentence 1) for the Wikipage. Instead, languages along the lines of "as E is varied" would be preferable in this type of writing. In addition, some sentences are a bit too long, and may be better broken into two separate sentences to make them easier to follow. For example: "populating antibonding orbitals usually suggests the breaking of a bond and thus the fact that the energy value associated with this donation is seen to increase down the group (see Table 1) reflects the increasing resonance weight towards the ketene isomers" (Varying E section, sentence 5).
• Regarding citations: In addition to putting down citations in text, I would recommend incorporating citations also directly within Table 1 and Table 2, as these tables are presenting data from literature.
• Others: Please fix some minor typos. (e.g. "analysis" in "Ambidentate nature of the anion" section; "utilize" and "predict" in the "Synthetic building blocks" section)
--Ruomengwan (talk) 06:47, 2 December 2018 (UTC)Ruomengwan
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