User talk:Batterybuzz
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ukexpat (talk) 21:48, 25 March 2010 (UTC)
Help
[edit]After some feedback on style I made some changes, but I still can't work out how to set the page live.Batterybuzz (talk) 10:37, 29 April 2010 (UTC)
- Hi there.
- The article is not ready to go live - if it was moved to the live area right now, it might be deleted.
- This is because it relies on primary sources. For inclusion, it must show significant coverage in independent reliable sources - not press-releases It would need to show e.g. several newspaper articles - some publication with a 'reputation for fact-checking and accuracy'. See User:Chzz/vrs for a summary.
- If you can add such sources, please use another {{helpme}} - or if you have further questions. Best, Chzz ► 10:44, 29 April 2010 (UTC)
Thank you for your helpful feedback. I have changed the references to articles in national newspapers and trade journals. If you think it needs more such references please let me know and I will add them. Batterybuzz (talk) 13:59, 3 May 2010 (UTC)
- Thanks. At a quick glance, it looks OK. I will review it more thoroughly ASAP - probably within the hour - and if acceptable, I can make it live. I will write more here, soon. Thanks again, Chzz ► 14:25, 3 May 2010 (UTC)
Review 3 May 2010
- Para. 1 lacks any source. A primary source may be appropriate here (ie co. website) to show what they make and where located. However, the word "advanced" in "advanced lithium-ion battery" seems non-neutral, should be removed unless independent RS can confirm it.
- "Axeon has received several technology development grants" - the source shows they have received one award, not several.
- "It is also collaborating with a range of partners, including Allied Vehicles, Scottish Power, Strathclyde University and Glasgow City Council, to run an electric vehicle demonstrator programme in Glasgow, Scotland" - ref. 2 seems to cover Glasgow City Council, and ref. 3 is re. University of St Andrews - so where are the references for the rest?
- "Unlike many other battery pack manufacturers, Axeon is independent of cell suppliers and can therefore choose the most appropriate cell for a particular application." - promotional, non-neutral, opinion, unreferenced
- "Currently it works mainly with Lithium Iron Phosphate and Lithium NCM (Nickel Cobalt Manganese)" - unreferenced
- The 'History' section is almost entirely unreferenced, apart from the last line.
Chzz ► 18:12, 3 May 2010 (UTC)
Thank you for your comments Chzz.
- I have added a primary source in Para 1 and removed the word "advanced".
- I have added source for another technology grant. The Jaguar project is also TSB-funded so I have added a sentence to show that.
- ref 2 does contain refs to Allied Vehicles, Scottish Power, Strathclyde University, who are all involved in the same project as Glasgow City Council.
- Re sentence on independence of cell suppliers I have changed this sentence, and it's now factual.
- "Currently it works mainly with Lithium Iron Phosphate and Lithium NCM (Nickel Cobalt Manganese)" - now referenced to company website
- History section has been removed.
Does this make the page eligible to go live now? thank you for your help Batterybuzz
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- I see that User:Chzz is helping you so I am removing the help labels. He will be along later to check thinigs out for you. If not you can repost the help template or visit his page and ask your questions there. JodyB talk 14:59, 7 October 2010 (UTC)
You used the {{helpme}} tag but did not ask a question. Please write out your question and replace the {{helpme}} tag when you are done, and someone will be along to help. Alternatively, you can ask your question at the new contributors help desk, the help desk, or join the #wikipedia-en-help IRC help channel to get real-time assistance. Click here for instant access. |
User:Chzz is taking a break from Wikipedia - can anyone else help please? Batterybuzz
- Please restate the issue/question. JoeGazz ▲ 15:00, 25 November 2010 (UTC)
This help request has been answered. If you need more help, you can , contact the responding user(s) directly on their user talk page, or consider visiting the Teahouse. |
User:Chzz conducted a review on 3rd May and outlined several reasons why this page had not been set live. I responded to all of those points as follows and would like to know if these responses are sufficient to set the page live. If not, what else should I do. my responses were:
- I have added a primary source in Para 1 and removed the word "advanced".
- I have added source for another technology grant. The Jaguar project is also TSB-funded so I have added a sentence to show that.
- ref 2 does contain refs to Allied Vehicles, Scottish Power, Strathclyde University, who are all involved in the same project as Glasgow City Council.
- Re sentence on independence of cell suppliers I have changed this sentence, and it's now factual.
- "Currently it works mainly with Lithium Iron Phosphate and Lithium NCM (Nickel Cobalt Manganese)" - now referenced to company website
- History section has been removed.
Does this make the page eligible to go live now? thank you for your help Batterybuzz
- I will take a look at it now.--SPhilbrickT 19:23, 29 November 2010 (UTC)
- Looks fine. I made some minor changes. You can move it if you want; if you don't know how, I'll do it for you.
- One area of potential improvement - your citations are pure urls. It would be much better if you would use proper citations. See footnotes for some information. I personally find it very helpful to use the optional citation gadget. To install, go to "My preferences", select the rightmost tab "Gadgets", the check the box next to refTools (in the Editing gadgets section). Once installed, it will add a new button "Cite" to your editing toolbar. Click on it to add a citation. Makes it much easier.--SPhilbrickT 19:34, 29 November 2010 (UTC)
- I fixed one of the references so you could see how it should look.--SPhilbrickT 19:41, 29 November 2010 (UTC)
- You should add some CATEGORIES after the page is moved.--SPhilbrickT 20:21, 29 November 2010 (UTC)
This help request has been answered. If you need more help, you can , contact the responding user(s) directly on their user talk page, or consider visiting the Teahouse. |
THanks very much SPhilbrick. I haven't been able to work out how to set the page live so please could you do that for me? I note your comment about citations -= I've installed the citation gadget andd will amendd the citations once the page is live. THanks very much for your help. Batterybuzz
I moved the page
[edit]It still could use some work, but I moved it to main space--SPhilbrickT 19:00, 3 December 2010 (UTC)