User talk:Angelv03
| This user is a student editor in Riverside_City_College/Honors_World_Religions_(Fall_2021) . |
Welcome!
[edit]Hello, Angelv03, and welcome to Wikipedia! My name is Ian and I work with Wiki Education; I help support students who are editing as part of a class assignment.
I hope you enjoy editing here. If you haven't already done so, please check out the student training library, which introduces you to editing and Wikipedia's core principles. You may also want to check out the Teahouse, a community of Wikipedia editors dedicated to helping new users. Below are some resources to help you get started editing.
Handouts
|
|---|
|
Additional Resources
|
|
If you have any questions, please don't hesitate to contact me on my talk page. Ian (Wiki Ed) (talk) 15:36, 13 September 2021 (UTC)
Peer Review
[edit]Content: I think that adding Hinduism to this page is relevant. However, at the beginning of the Hinduism section you say they both influence each other, but you only describe how Hinduism has influenced Buddhism, so you maybe want to change that or add how Buddhism has also influenced Hinduism. I also think it might help if you have the part about Buddha founding Buddhism being closer to the beginning, and maybe a little more on its founding to establish how Buddhism broke off from Hinduism. Adding some links to other Wikipedia pages on things like Hinduism and Buddha might also be helpful for the reader!
Tone and Balance: I think your tone is very good, nothing here sounds biased at all, it sounds very neutral and factual. It doesn't sound like there is any persuasion or anything happening, just presenting the information.
Organization: In the sentence after the Hinduism header, and the sentence after your second source, you put "form" when it looks like you meant "from."
I definitely think the addition of Hinduism is important when understanding Buddhism's relation to Eastern religions, as you have shown. I think just rearranging the order of your information will make it flow better! Jbstone09 (talk) 10:00, 29 October 2021 (UTC)