User talk:AJC301/Personal Sandbox

Comments

You need to add an overall heading to your article. When I first opened it I didn't know what I was reading about. You keep the sections short and to the point which is good, but a little more detail would help with the elaboration and give you more length. Hist fall2011 (talk) 20:43, 28 November 2011 (UTC)

Actually, you don't need an over all heading. If/when this is moved into Wikipedia proper, Wikipedia will automatically create a title. If you try and make one manually it will result in the Table of Contents appearing above your Lead Section. Aaron.Sullivan (talk) 22:16, 30 November 2011 (UTC)

I liked your article. You gave enough information about his life without dragging on. Shoff75 (talk) 18:54, 2 December 2011 (UTC)

At the first paragraph, you generally explained who William Sylvis is. However, there is no explanation how this character related to the American history. Other than that, this page is organized well by each section and developing time through paragraphs. It seems too brief on sentences though. For example, when you explain about the National Labor Union, there could be more explanation of it. This organization’s history, achievements, and condition of these days could be added. Other information about William Sylvis is also lack. There can be more specific expressions about Sylvis’ family. What his parents did for their life, where they were from, and how other siblings were like. It seems like William Sylvis had two wives and there is no information about how he could get his second wife. There is not much information which connects the story of William Sylvis and the historical event at his era. — Preceding unsigned comment added by See Kim (talk • contribs) 20:55, 2 December 2011 (UTC)