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User:Wsmith5335/Ord's thyroiditis/Purplesquire Peer Review

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General info

[edit]
Whose work are you reviewing?

Wsmith5335

Link to draft you're reviewing
User:Wsmith5335/Ord's thyroiditis
Link to the current version of the article (if it exists)
Ord's thyroiditis

Evaluate the drafted changes

[edit]

Lead

The current lead is a good overview, with the first sentance agreat overview. However "It is more common among women than men." feels a little out of place, if it were to be combined with another sentence it might flow better. Also, all the information in the lead is not present in the rest of the article, so if the rest of the article were expanded to contain that information the lead would be more of a summary.

Content

The content added is really relevant and up to date. Some content that could be added would be: an expanded diagnosis section (and make it more readable), find sources for all the other sections in the article.

Tone

The tone felt very neutral and professional.

Sources

The added information doesn't feel like it quite aligns with the source, as the source lists those symptoms to hypothyroidism in general, and not specifically to Ord's thyroiditis. If you could also find a source that states that Ord's thyroiditis or a source that focuses more on Ord's thyroiditis, that would be great.

Organization

Overall, the sections are organized really well. The diagnosis section could be written more clearly, maybe with a description of what TSH and fT4 are, or at least a link to a different Wikipedia article.

Overall

Overall, this is a good addition to the article, it expands upon the information previously there, as well as putting a source to it.