User:Wolfechu

Genesis

Born on August 25th, 1972. Anything which is claimed to have happened prior to this is purely hearsay, and therefore irrevelant. Originates from Edlington, South Yorkshire, a village much noted for its descent into Mad Max style savagery since the local colliery closed in the 1980s.

Dimensions

• 6'5". That's 195.6cm, metric types. Weighs approximately 250lbs (113.4Kg), but hides it surprisingly well.
• Recorded IQ of 144. Apparently that's quite good.
• Much bigger on the inside.

Chronology

• 4004 BCE - 1971 CE: A quiet time for Wolfechu fans.
• 1972 - 1990: Spent much time growing, and being Educated at Edlington Comprehensive. Got the hell out of Dodge as soon as reasonably possible.
• 1991 - 1994: Attended Derby School of Nursing. Somehow managed to pass as an Registered General Nurse. Still is, amazingly.
• 1995 - 2002: Succession of jobs at Derby City General Hospital, including work in Operating Theatres, Coronary Care, and 'miscellaneous' (read Geriatrics). Discovered the dazzling world of the Internet shortly after blowing 1000GBP on a Pentium 60. Fell into the quicksand world of MUDs shortly thereafter, particularly the astonishing time waster known as *Aardwolf". Was fool enough to actually become an Immortal on there, but came to his senses on 19th February, 2002. Was lucky enough to find an equally foolish venture immediately after, and decides (with sufficient pointing out of the obvious by friends) to start a Long_distance_relationship with an American girl.
• May, 2002: They meet for the first time. He drops the question. She proves he's not the only foolish one by saying 'yes'.
• 2002 - 2007: Much back and forth across the Atlantic. Had he known about frequent flier miles at this point, could have afforded seats on the Shuttle. Much paperwork, much dealings with INS. Much wailing and gnashing of teeth.
• December 4th, 2007: Shortly after finally being permitted into the country, sort of, they marry. In a Pub. The paperwork trail continues. They might even allow employment soon.

Apocrypha

Just getting the hang of this Wikipedia business. Minor edits made to:

• Edlington
• TARDIS

No doubt others will follow.

Esoterica

When not avidly editing both pages, wastes the precious gift of life on:

• MUDs - Still hasn't learned. Particularly Discworld MUD at present.
• Nethack - And is, self-admittedly, a complete stud at the game, having something like 20 ascensions and counting.
• Doctor Who - Watches it, reads it, listens to it, breathes it. Would buy the towel if one existed.
• Any other scifi he can lay his hands on.
• Doing his best to be a wonderful husband. Because she will read this.

External Links

• The Unlightable Beingness of Bears, his infrequently updated Livejournal.
• Doing it for the Benjamins, the blog where he links to all his articles on Associated_Content and Helium under the name 'Dave Simmons', in a desperate attempts to earn peanuts. Dance, monkey! Dance!
• Vague fictional contributions to The One Million Monkeys Typing Project
• Likewise for ficlets.com