User:Noirdame/greeting

Welcome to Wikipedia

From a dusky, dark alley I welcome you to Wikipedia! Down these glassy, rain-stained streets walk men and women of hope - some of them tarnished by experience, but still valiant in their cause.

Ur, that cause, by the way, you can learn more about at the five pillars of Wikipedia. It sounds like a beautiful, porcelain temple, and it is - a temple of questions, some of them the kind that keep you up until 3 AM wondering at the mystery of it all.

Let me pour you a drink. I drink club soda myself. Occupational hazard. You may have some other questions about how things work in this town. When I first got here, I'd been a dick for a while, you know - a private writing dick. I had my novels in a drawer, lots of stories about cool dames in china blue dresses, and the PIs who loved them.

But I had questions too. This Wikipedia joint, it has standards. It's open to everyone, but everyone's responsible for making it smooth and cool, you dig?

As I pounded the pavement, I found that the more I edited my way through these streets, the more questions I had. Questions I could only find answers to when I closed my eyes and thought really, really hard about moonlight. Except that didn't help. It was much easier for me to practice using the tutorial, and the sandbox.

But I think you'll like this town. I hope you decide to stay. We always need more brave, valiant writers and editors in Burberry trenchcoats. Actually, you don't need a trenchcoat.

One more thing. When you greet people - don't let them know you're packing, if you're packing. I got in trouble that way once. Sign your name when you talk, using four tildes (~ is a tilde) typed in a row; this will automatically produce your name and the date. Tildes can be trusted. They're legit.

If you need help or backup on a tough day, check out Wikipedia:Where to ask a question, ask me on my talk page, or place {{helpme}} on your talk page and someone will show up shortly to answer your questions.

P.S. Yes, I am a Raymond Chandler fan.