User:Marissaogata
Peer Review Edits by Neil D.:
- Perhaps use another word for bacteria in the first line "Bioluminescent bacteria are ... (bacteria)".
- Perhaps change the link that goes to bioluminescence to include the entire phrase "biological purposes of bioluminescence" or just "bioluminescence"
- The section related to purpose of bioluminescence goes into more detail about the dispersal, but not so much detail about the other reasons for
having bioluminescence; perhaps expand on how it attracts mates and wards off predators.
- Definitely link to mm and sub-mm wave coupling; I feel that is a topic that needs to be further clarified if it's going to be included in the article.
- "It has been proposed that bioelectromagnetics may be involved in biological processes behind bio-luminescence, which may function as a pump."
Reword this sentence so it's clearer that the bioelectromagnets may function as a pump, not the bioluminescence. This section is more dense than
I feel it needs to be. Perhaps simplify some of the concepts in the bioelectromagnetics section.
- "Nevertheless, all bio-luminescent bacteria share a common gene sequence: the enzymatic oxidation of Aldehyde and reduced Flavin mononucleotide by luciferase which are contained in the lux operon." This sentence says gene sequence but then talks about a reaction processes, so this is a little confusing.
I think the article did well in concisely summarizing the content, but there were some instances where the content seemed to be higher than
the average audience member's level of understanding for the topic. I think the best way to improve the article would be to redefine some of the
more complicated terms to make the article just slightly easier to read.
Peer Review Edits by Rayna T.:
Hi Marissa! I really enjoyed reading your article. Overall, it was really clear, concise, and easy to understand. I also appreciated your use of images in multiple sections and how you took care to briefly provide definitions for many of the more advanced vocabulary (like quorum sensing). Overall I didn't have too many edits to suggest, but here are the ones that I took note of:
- Under "Purpose of Bio-Luminescence", there is a sentence that begins with “It has been hypothesized that enteric bacteria…”. Perhaps you could provide a brief definition on what enteric bacteria are or just mention that they are found in the gut. It was a word I had to look up while reading the article, so others might have the same question.
- Under "Bioelectromagnetics of Bio-Luminescnece", you include that “This pump may involve mm and sub-mm wave coupling of bio-luminescence radiation for quorum sensing regulation.” What does it mean when the pump involves mm and sub-mm wave coupling of bioluminescent radiation? Do mm and sub-mm stand for something? This section was the hardest for me to understand, but it may also be because I have a weak background in bioelectromagnetics. Some simple definitions could help me in this section.
Great work finding what was important about bioluminescence and covering those topics in a straightforward manner!
Topic: Bioluminescent Bacteria
Bibliography:
Bolelli, L., E. N. Ferri, and S. Girotti. "The Management and Exploitation of Naturally Light-Emitting Bacteria as a Flexible Analytical Tool: A Tutorial." Analytica Chimica Acta 934 (2016): 22-35. Print.
Fernandez-Pinas, F., et al. "Evaluation of the Ecotoxicity of Pollutants with Bioluminescent Microorganisms Evaluation of the Ecotoxicity of Pollutants with Bioluminescent Microorganisms." Bioluminescence: Fundamentals and Applications in Biotechnology, Vol 2 145 (2014): 65-135. Print.
Girotti, S., et al. "Monitoring of Environmental Pollutants by Bioluminescent Bacteria." Analytica Chimica Acta 608.1 (2008): 2-29. Print.
Nealson, K. H., and J. W. Hastings. "Bacterial Bioluminescence - Its Control and Ecological Significance." Microbiological Reviews 43.4 (1979): 496-518. Print.
Titushin, M. S., et al. "Protein-Protein Complexation in Bioluminescence." Protein & Cell 2.12 (2011): 957-72. Print.
This user is a student editor in Wikipedia:Wiki_Ed/UCLA/Chem_153A_Honors_(Winter_2017). Student assignments should always be carried out using a course page set up by the instructor. It is usually best to develop assignments in your sandbox. After evaluation, the additions may go on to become a Wikipedia article or be published in an existing article. |