User:EoinFeeney1/OLES2129

August 14 Activity 2

The article I decided to look at was David Lynch, which had it's first major edit on 13 November 2001, https://en.wikipedia.org/w/index.php?title=David_Lynch&oldid=442665315. If I had been this article's creator I would have added much more information, including David Lynch's date of birth, where he was born, and some information about his childhood. I would have created separate sections, one for early life, then the beginnings of his artistic pursuits as a painter, joining film school and creating Eraserhead then another section describing each of his films and a final section titled David Lynch Filmography which would include a list of all the films he had written and directed. If I was the second editor I would have changed the wording of "American film-maker," to, "American Director and Writer," in order to more specifically describe the way he is involved in film making. Additionally I would have specified the role he had in creating each of the films included in the "Famous Movies," section.

August 21 Activity 1

I randomly was taken to the page Khanpur, Dehli, which has a Stub rating. In order to bring it to a Start quality article, the next level of the Wikipedia project assesment scale, much is necessary. To begin with a lot more information is required in the article, at the moment it is only two sentences long, mostly concerning the geography of the area. This is important information, however I would add multiple sections, following a template laid out by the article Dehli. This would mean structuring the article with sub sections on for example, toponymy, history, ecology, economy, demographics etc.

In addition the sentences which are included in the article currently could have their grammar improved. This is one of the sentences currently, "Its surrounding localities are Saket ,Madangir ,Sainik farms, Ambedkar Nagar, plus Indo-Tibetan Border Police's (ITBP) National Centre for UNCIVPOL training is also situated at Tigri in Khanpur"

I would add a period at the end of the sentence, move the commas after "Saket," and "Madangir," to the space next to the word rather than in front of the next word as they currently are. Additionally, I believe turning that sentence into two sentences, one concerning the localities and the second describing the Indo-Tibetan Border Police's National Centre.

August 21 Activity 2: Citation Needed

On the page Healthism.

I have added a citation needed tag after the sentence. "But while Skrabanek's version is used as a basis to criticize state interventions to coerce people into healthy lifestyles, according to Rose, the capitalist society finds coercion unnecessary," because there is no source given to substantiate this claim. EoinFeeney1 (talk) 07:42, 21 August 2018 (UTC).

This is the text from the talk page.

August 28 Activity 1: Featured Article

Today's featured article was about the Sind sparrow. It is classified as a featured article because:

It has a very comprehensive reference list, with 43 separate reference listings and frequent citations within the article itself.
The lead gives a good introduction to the topic, sumarising key information and setting up the rest of the article within the first paragraph.
Structured well. It has a good flow, with the introduction leading into a description, then a taxonomy, distribution and then behaviour, each separated into their own sections.
It employs an information box on the right side providing a useful image and important standard information such as the conservation status and the scientific classification.
This article falls into the Wikiprojects:Birds category, and follows the article outlines set out within that project.

Article Sections:

Most of the bird species articles have a common structure which include various combinations of the following:

Taxonomy and systematics (including subspecies, relation to related species, history of naming, alternate names, and evolution)
Description (often including details on immature plumage, moult, vocalisations, identification, and similar species)
Distribution and habitat
Behaviour and ecology.