User:Cmccoy0913/Slump (sports)/BTayOkay Peer Review
Peer review
Complete your peer review exercise below, providing as much constructive criticism as possible. The more detailed suggestions you provide, the more useful it will be to your classmate. Make sure you consider each of the following aspects: LeadGuiding questions:
ContentGuiding questions:
Tone and BalanceGuiding questions:
Sources and ReferencesGuiding questions:
OrganizationGuiding questions:
Images and MediaGuiding questions: If your peer added images or media
For New Articles OnlyIf the draft you're reviewing is for a new article, consider the following in addition to the above.
Overall impressionsGuiding questions:
Examples of good feedbackA good article evaluation can take a number of forms. The most essential things are to clearly identify the biggest shortcomings, and provide specific guidance on how the article can be improved.
Additional Resources |
General info
[edit]- Whose work are you reviewing?
Cmccoy0913
- Link to the current version of the article (if it exists)
- Slump (sports)
Evaluate the drafted changes
[edit]Overall
Great job improving the article! I think you did a really good job picking important topics to highlight and organized everything really well. It is definitely a better article now that you have worked on it. I give you some suggestions to flesh things out a bit more, but the biggest improvements you could make have to do with citing and sources. All that being said I think you should be proud of the work you did!
Lead
Overall I think the lead is really good! Perhaps just add a line that lets people know about the "Famous slumps" section later. Something like, "Throughout history, there have been a number of famous slumps by high profile athletes."
Content
The three man sections of the article feel necessary and important. They show that you researched well and thought out what would make the biggest impact on the article.
I do think there is opportunities to flesh out more of the information. That could be more recent slumps or elaborating more on how to avoid slumps: the injury avoidance section really just says, "athletes should avoid injuries." How can athletes avoid injuries? based on your references of course.
Tone and Balance
Overall I think everything is very neutral and balanced. I made a couple little edits here and there to try and help with that. Nothing much. Just try and remember that examples are still facts and should be cited. Or, you should provided examples that are based off of what your references describe.
Organization
Organization is great! I don't see anyway this can be improved.
Sources and References
There is an opportunity for more citations and references to improve the article. I think the lead is cited really well. The "Psychological causes" section is also cited well, althought there is still one or two facts that could use a citation if you are able to find one.
"Physical causes" has two full paragraphs without a citation. I understand that these are examples you are providing, but they are still stated as facts. Facts should be cited. I wonder if you the references you've already used could be utilized in this case? If not, I'm sure you could find references somewhere that states that injuries cause a dip in performance and that bad habits diminish abilities.
"Avoiding slumps" is also cited pretty well, but again there are a few facts that could be cited if able.
I think the most important citation that needs citations is "Famous slumps." Find news articles or essays that cover these slumps or the events that occur within them. Unfortunately, when you are describing history, citations are all the more important.