User:BTayOkay/Indie Megabooth/Hannahgerny Peer Review
Peer review
Complete your peer review exercise below, providing as much constructive criticism as possible. The more detailed suggestions you provide, the more useful it will be to your classmate. Make sure you consider each of the following aspects: LeadGuiding questions:
ContentGuiding questions:
Tone and BalanceGuiding questions:
Sources and ReferencesGuiding questions:
OrganizationGuiding questions:
Images and MediaGuiding questions: If your peer added images or media
For New Articles OnlyIf the draft you're reviewing is for a new article, consider the following in addition to the above.
Overall impressionsGuiding questions:
Examples of good feedbackA good article evaluation can take a number of forms. The most essential things are to clearly identify the biggest shortcomings, and provide specific guidance on how the article can be improved.
Additional Resources |
General info
[edit]- Whose work are you reviewing?
BTayOkay
- Link to the current version of the article (if it exists)
- Indie Megabooth
Evaluate the drafted changes
[edit]Overall
- It's super evident that you've added new, useful information. The information is really relevant and you've done a great job! The places I see room for improvement are in the lead and the cultural intermediary sections. In the lead, you can just disperse some of that information to the history section so that the content from the lead is discussed more in detail in later sections. In the cultural intermediary section I think you can slightly tweak organization and attribute the argument in that section to a scholar, which will help you with a more neutral tone. Overall, it looks good!
Lead
- The lead has been updated to reflect the new content and clearly describes the topic
- However, the lead mentions some content that isn't discussed in the history or cultural intermediary sections
- The lead specifically mentions a few shows that the megabooth expanded to. (eurogamer expo, gamescom, etc), but these specifics aren't stated in the history section, make sure to note this in the history section and could add the exact years/ dates that the megabooth was first expanded to those shows if you want to add more content to the history section
- The lead also talks about how the megabooth was "sunsetted" in 2020 and brought out of hibernation in 2023, but these details arent mentioned in the history section
- This is crucial information that should be mentioned in the history
- You can move some content around by combining the 2020 and 2023 sentences in the lead and reserve the remaining details (like the announcement being part of a summer game fest) for the history section
Content
- The added content is relevant to the topic
- The content appears up to date, assuming that since the announcement in 2023 the India Megabooth hasn't had another public appearance/ been in operation
- Might want to clarify if the megabooth simply announced a return at the summer game fest or actually returned/ was operational at the summer game fest, not very clear in this section
Tone and balance
- The content appears neutral and unbiased
- The only spot you could potentially hav e amore neutral tone is in the cultural intermediary section
- Qualifying something as a cultural intermediary is likely subjective, so some people might disagree
- You could present this section as scholars' arguments/ opinions to make it more neutral (ex: saying "provides proof" is leaning toward an argument, should clarify that the scholar is making that connection, not wikipedia)
Sources and references
- The content accurately reflects the cited sources
- I noticed a broken link for the 12th citation about the booth being sunsetted, can likely replace that source with another article that mentions the megabooth left
Organization
- Content is well written
- As stated earlier, some detailed content from the lead can be moved to the history section
- Organization could be improved in the last section
- I see that the first paragraph is outlining what a cultural intermediary is and the second is showing that the megabooth is all 3 things (seller, tastemaker, authority), but its a little hard to follow/ the connection between some of the concepts is not super clear (ex: the connection between the sentence "the idea of selling symbolic goods could be restated" and "the indie megabooth chooses which games" is unclear, could instead say something like "The Indie Megabooth manipulates culture by deciding what games will be showcased at events, which influences the games are popular in the indie video game community")
- Reworking the two paragraphs to make it clearer might be good and also might help neutralize the tone
- For example:
- Keep the first paragraph as it is
- Next paragraph: more clearly connect the first and second paragraph and note that wikipedia is reporting on a scholar's argument (ex: "Academic scholars have commented that the Indie Megabooth fulfills the role of a seller of symbolic goods, a tastemaker, and an authority of legitimation") and then discuss the details of the article
- I see that the first paragraph is outlining what a cultural intermediary is and the second is showing that the megabooth is all 3 things (seller, tastemaker, authority), but its a little hard to follow/ the connection between some of the concepts is not super clear (ex: the connection between the sentence "the idea of selling symbolic goods could be restated" and "the indie megabooth chooses which games" is unclear, could instead say something like "The Indie Megabooth manipulates culture by deciding what games will be showcased at events, which influences the games are popular in the indie video game community")