User:1Mehayla/Racial achievement gap in the United States/LLAVE42 Peer Review
Peer review
[edit]This is where you will complete your peer review exercise. Please use the following template to fill out your review.
General info
[edit]- Whose work are you reviewing? 1Mehayla
- Link to draft you're reviewing: User:1Mehayla
You have been BUSY!
Thank you for editing this page as heavily as you have. To be thorough, I will list by section any paragraph that needs editing. Let's go!
New Lead Section (could be re-written as, and is just a suggestion)
In the United States, the racial achievement gap describes educational achievement disparities between ethnic groups, captured by distinct differences in average grades, standardized testing, high school completion rates, college attendance, and completion of higher educational degrees between Latino, Chicano, and African American students as compared to White and Asian American counterparts. The origin of this issue is widely contested and politicized, considering the effects of how individual environmental factors and resource distribution impact educational outcomes [insert source]. Additionally, political histories such as anti-literacy laws and current policies dictating school funding have resulted in education deficits between districts, schools, and students.
History Section
Here, I recommend looking for explicit policies that prevented minority groups from attaining educational equality, such as legally segregated schools, the policy of separate but equal and how that impacted funding. Be careful not become too tied up in this. It can get toxic real quick. And cite, Cite, CITE! Good idea to link to existing pages for content support.
Social Inequality
Define "multidimensional poverty". This could be something someone builds off of later, but it's a perfect term to normalize.
"I present a collection of contemporary racism as a reminder that racism still exists"
The "Relics of Racism" is catchy, but still very real. Maybe "Effects & Echos of Racism"?
Link Eugenics to the genetic differences...
Overall, there is so much to do, but remember you do not need to bite off such a huge chunk. Self care, breathe, and talk out any other concerns you may have while completing your work.