Template talk:Did you know nominations/Jamie Kalven

Hook modifications

... that journalist Jamie Kalven (pictured) had to sue for the release of Chicago police misconduct records, and eventually amassed a database of nearly 250,000 allegations against police officers? [2023-07-25 at 15:26:36, by AirshipJungleman29]
... that Chicago journalist Jamie Kalven (pictured) eventually amassed a database of nearly 250,000 allegations against police officers? [2023-07-25 at 15:27:13, by AirshipJungleman29]

GalliumBot (talk • contribs) (he/it) 16:25, 25 July 2023 (UTC)[reply]

Phrasing

@AirshipJungleman29 Thanks for promoting! I see that you shortened the hook. Do you think we still need to include the word "eventually" in the text? Edge3 (talk) 22:58, 25 July 2023 (UTC)[reply]

@AirshipJungleman29 So sorry to bother you again, but I have another request. Should we mention in the hook that they are "misconduct allegations", rather than just mere "allegations"? Alternatively, you could use the wording "allegations of misconduct by police officers". Edge3 (talk) 16:14, 26 July 2023 (UTC)[reply]

I don't think that's necessary, Edge3. I can't think of many allegations you could make against police officers that doesn't fall under "misconduct", used in a general sense like here. ~~ AirshipJungleman29 (talk) 16:17, 26 July 2023 (UTC)[reply]

Makes sense! Thanks for the input. Edge3 (talk) 16:35, 26 July 2023 (UTC)[reply]

Hook modifications

... that Chicago journalist Jamie Kalven (pictured) eventually amassed a database of nearly 250,000 allegations against police officers? [2023-07-26 at 12:50:50, by AirshipJungleman29]
... that Chicago journalist Jamie Kalven (pictured) amassed a database of nearly 250,000 allegations against police officers? [2023-07-26 at 13:08:59, by AirshipJungleman29]

GalliumBot (talk • contribs) (he/it) 13:26, 26 July 2023 (UTC)[reply]