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Template:Did you know nominations/My Play is Done

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The following discussion is an archived discussion of the DYK nomination of the article below. Please do not modify this page. Subsequent comments should be made on the appropriate discussion page (such as this nomination's talk page, the article's talk page or Wikipedia talk:Did you know), unless there is consensus to re-open the discussion at this page. No further edits should be made to this page.

The result was: rejected by BlueMoonset (talk) 21:27, 12 August 2013 (UTC)
Article not edited since July 16; close paraphrasing identified July 17 still hasn't been addressed, and promises to deal with issues have not even been started.

My Play is Done

[edit]

Swami Vivekananda

Created by Titodutta (talk). Self nominated at 10:53, 10 July 2013 (UTC).

  • I'm not entirely convinced that the hook is supported by the source. The source states that the concept of "home" is actually an escape from the cycle of birth and death - rather than specifically saying that he wants to return to India. Miyagawa (talk) 11:40, 14 July 2013 (UTC)
  • Good catch. I need to make changes in the article too.
ALT1: ... that in the poem My Play is Done, Swami Vivekananda (pictured) expressed his desire to return home, as he felt, the task of spreading his Master's message abroad was finally accomplished? --TitoDutta 12:31, 14 July 2013 (UTC)
  • Alt1 good to go for DYK. Miyagawa (talk) 21:33, 15 July 2013 (UTC)
  • Pulling from prep area. Article and hook both closely paraphrase the source in wording like "task of spreading his Master's message abroad" and "finally accomplished". I didn't find any other issues with close paraphrasing. This should be reasonably easy to fix by minor rewriting, but because it affects both article and hook, I think it needs to be taken out of prep area. --Orlady (talk) 03:11, 17 July 2013 (UTC)
While trying to figure out how best to reword the article, I carefully reviewed the article and the sources cited, as well as other sources about the poem and the writer. I confirmed from sources that he wrote this poem midway through his time in America -- on March 16, 1895, before the time at Thousand Island Park that is described in the article. The chronology in the article is odd -- it doesn't make a lot of sense to focus so much on the work that he did after he wrote the poem. Also, I found that only one source suggests that the poem was about the completion of his work of spreading his master's message. This source states that the theme of the poem is "the awareness of the endless nature of the quest for God" and discusses "the fervent clinging of the child to the mother" and the "impassioned poetic frenzy" in the poem. This book discusses the poem as visionary. This book (which is cited in the article) also describes it as visionary, and as a fusion of religion and mysticism. This source suggests that the poem was written during a dark mood. (That's a bit simplistic. I think it's pretty easy to read the poem as expressing a desire to leave this life -- i.e., a wish for death, but the poem is more complicated than that.)
After reading those sources, I am unable to accept the proposed hook as factually accurate. I can't say what Swami V. was thinking when he wrote the poem. I think that a hook could be created for this article by quoting or paraphrasing some expert's interpretation of the poem, for example: "... that Famous Expert interprets the poem "My Play is Done" as indicating Swami Vivekananda's ____." Of course, the article will need to be revised to present the content in the hook. --Orlady (talk) 02:34, 18 July 2013 (UTC)
  • Will try to fix in next few days. --TitoDutta 12:13, 27 July 2013 (UTC)
  • No progress in the week since promise made to address this "in next few days". In fact there have been no edits to the article since the hook was pulled back on July 16. --Allen3 talk 13:53, 3 August 2013 (UTC)
    • Will do in next 48 hours or so. --TitoDutta 16:35, 3 August 2013 (UTC)
      • Another time extension has come and gone (it has been more than 72 hours since the request for an extra 48 hours) and still nothing has been done to resolve the outstanding issues. --Allen3 talk 00:02, 7 August 2013 (UTC)
  • Orlady's comments above are difficult to address. She commented (most probably without being aware) that her comments touched the themes like Moksha, sannyasa etc. I can change alt to ... written at [time], [place] --TitoDutta 05:55, 7 August 2013 (UTC)
  • I actually started by striking ALT1 entirely, as Orlady pointed out the close paraphrasing used in it. A new ALT hook is needed, but there hasn't been a single edit to the article since July 16, including the close paraphrasing noted on July 17. That's simply unacceptable. The tentative suggestion of a "written at time, place" wording would be an uninteresting replacement hook, even if the close paraphrasing had been taken care of. As it hasn't, and the nominator has been working instead on creating new DYK content, this nomination is closed. BlueMoonset (talk) 21:27, 12 August 2013 (UTC)