Template:Did you know nominations/Khin Ma Ma Maw

The following is an archived discussion of the DYK nomination of the article below. Please do not modify this page. Subsequent comments should be made on the appropriate discussion page (such as this nomination's talk page, the article's talk page or Wikipedia talk:Did you know), unless there is consensus to re-open the discussion at this page. No further edits should be made to this page.

The result was: rejected by BlueMoonset (talk) 19:40, 13 April 2022 (UTC)
See closing comment at the bottom of this template.

Khin Ma Ma Maw

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Premier Ba Maw and his wife Consort Maw at the Coronation of George VI in 1937

... that Khin Ma Ma Maw (pictured) was the Burma's first Nanyinwun Kadaw and the only First Lady of Burma during the Japanese occupation of Burma? Source: "မြန်မာပြည်က ပထမလေဒီ၊ ဦးသျှောင်တို့ရဲ့ မဟေသီများ". BBC News (in Burmese). 22 November 2020.

Created by Taung Tan (talk). Self-nominated at 15:02, 1 February 2022 (UTC).

some strange sentences that might need clarifying (I would do it myself if I understood Burmese), e.g. Ba Maw was a joint decision on the political affairs taken with his wife also some of the citations are missing page numbers Kingoflettuce (talk) 01:55, 4 February 2022 (UTC)

@Kingoflettuce: I made some minor edits to clarfy some sentences, on behalf of Taung Tan. If you don't mind, pls check again. TIA. Htanaungg (talk) 08:37, 5 February 2022 (UTC)

Would you happen to know the page numbers being cited? Kingoflettuce (talk) 12:36, 5 February 2022 (UTC)

@Kingoflettuce: Google Books, unfortunately, doesn't show page numbers for (Than 2013); otherwise, all have been added. Htanaungg (talk) 04:35, 7 February 2022 (UTC)

Would be helpful to explain what "nanyinwun kadaw" means, especially since there isn't an article for that Kingoflettuce (talk) 10:55, 7 February 2022 (UTC)

@Kingoflettuce: Done mentioning its simple translation. Htanaungg (talk) 05:24, 8 February 2022 (UTC)

@Kingoflettuce: Nanyinwun kadaw is successor position of Ngahtaung-ser Kadaw during the British rule. Not likely today's spouse of the PM, it was an official position not PR stunt. Taung Tan (talk) 11:50, 20 February 2022 (UTC)

This nomination needs a full review, since one has never been done. Flibirigit (talk) 17:45, 13 March 2022 (UTC)

Why review so longgggggg????? Taung Tan (talk) 09:53, 20 March 2022 (UTC)

The article was new enough and long enough at the time of the nomination. I did not find any close paraphrasing. The hook fact (that she was the first "Nanyinwun Kadaw") is mentioned in sentences in the article but they lack footnotes. I think the hook could also be revised to clarify that "Nanyinwun Kadaw" means the wife of the prime minister or (as far as I can tell) roughly Burmese for "First Lady". I think the article may also need some copyediting since there is some strange wording in the article (such as she made her husband... escaped from the prison and which thereafter she strangely started). Since the nominator has only three DYK credits a QPQ is not required here. Narutolovehinata5 (talk · contributions) 10:00, 22 March 2022 (UTC)
I'd like to suggest that when a new ALT hook is proposed, at least one of the three uses of "Burma" is trimmed, and also the "the" in "the Burma's". Thanks. BlueMoonset (talk) 22:03, 26 March 2022 (UTC)

@BlueMoonset: I think the current hook could be split into two separate hooks. Perhaps either of these could work?

ALT1 ... that Khin Ma Ma Maw (pictured) was the first Nanyinwun Kadaw or First Lady of Burma?

ALT2 ... that Khin Ma Ma Maw (pictured) was the only First Lady of Burma during the the country's Japanese occupation?

Narutolovehinata5 (talk · contributions) 23:34, 26 March 2022 (UTC)

@BlueMoonset: Is it okay if you give ALT1 and ALT2 a look? The nominator hasn't edited since their last comment on March 20th despite a talk page message and if they don't respond soon and address the other concerns, the nomination may end up needing to be closed. Narutolovehinata5 (talk · contributions) 10:43, 2 April 2022 (UTC)
Narutolovehinata5, I'm not excited by either ALT hook—"first" hooks aren't generally interesting, this one especially given the unfamiliar term, and "only first lady" strikes me as "so what?". What might work as a hook is that she was First Lady twice, first when Burma was controlled by the British (her husband lasted about two years) and a couple of years later by the Japanese, but the article needs more work before it can adequately support such a hook. The History section needs cleaning and expansion, especially for the first paragraph's final sentence, which is incomprehensible, and the bulk of the following paragraph. It's also unclear in her husband's article just when he was actually head of state when the Japanese loosened the reins somewhat: one place gives the dates as 1942 to 1945, and another from 1 August 1943 to March 1945; he had apparently become head of the government a year earlier, but that isn't the same thing, and it's unclear whether she would have been considered "first lady" at that point. BlueMoonset (talk) 20:05, 2 April 2022 (UTC)
The nominator hasn't edited since March 20th despite a talk page message. There are issues with the hooks as well as the article. If another editor wants to adopt this nomination or the nominator returns then the nomination can continue, but otherwise it is now marked for closure as stale. Narutolovehinata5 (talk · contributions) 08:43, 3 April 2022 (UTC)
Hi, I'm here. I support your ALT2 ... that Khin Ma Ma Maw (pictured) was the only First Lady of the State of Burma? _ Burma and State of Burma are not same. Taung Tan (talk) 16:37, 3 April 2022 (UTC)

Thank you for the new hook; however, the article issues remain unresolved. I'm also not sure if the hook can avoid confusion to those who do not know the distinction between the State of Burma and Burma/Myanmar. Narutolovehinata5 (talk · contributions) 11:03, 4 April 2022 (UTC)

Closing comment: the article issues remain significant, with incomprehensible wording ("plopping") and unclear phrasing. In addition, the second Biography paragraph does not reflect the source; in particular, it mentions only a single volunteer organization which was for both men and women, not just for women. Worse, the final 15 words ending in "patients in hospital" are a directly copy from the source, and the two phrases before them are flipped, a clear copyright violation. BlueMoonset (talk) 19:40, 13 April 2022 (UTC)

So what? What is your problem? BlueMoonset. Taung Tan (talk) 03:43, 14 April 2022 (UTC)

I was busy and no time to edit in Wikipedia. Just I fixed the error. So reopen the case. You are closed unfair without my explain or me who was busy in education. Taung Tan (talk) 03:52, 14 April 2022 (UTC)