Template:Did you know nominations/Gordon Ramsay at Claridge's

The following discussion is an archived discussion of the DYK nomination of the article below. Please do not modify this page. Subsequent comments should be made on the appropriate discussion page (such as this nomination's talk page, the article's talk page or Wikipedia talk:Did you know), unless there is consensus to re-open the discussion at this page. No further edits should be made to this page.

The result was: promoted by Allen3 ^talk 11:05, 4 October 2013 (UTC)

Gordon Ramsay at Claridge's

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* ... that the restaurant Gordon Ramsay at Claridge's was the first collaboration between chef Gordon Ramsay (pictured) and Blackstone Group, which would later generate more than £1 billion in takings for his restaurants?

Reviewed: Lesser Grey Shrike

Created by Miyagawa (talk). Self nominated at 18:15, 20 September 2013 (UTC).

Thorough article, new enough and long enough. I spot no plagiarism and the hook is cited by an offline book I sadly do not own. Cheers, ☯ Bonkers The Clown \(^_^)/ Nonsensical Babble ☯ 13:29, 21 September 2013 (UTC)

Humble Pie was a better read IMHO - Playing with Fire is good from a Wiki POV as it states a lot about certain restaurants (expect to see Gordon Ramsay at The London (New York) and Gordon Ramsay Plane Food appear soon, but it is rather disjointed. Mind you, it's probably about time for his third book to cover the past six years since he'll have plenty to talk about with the near bankruptcy and then the fallout with his father in law. Anyway, going off topic! Thanks for the review. :) Miyagawa (talk) 19:49, 21 September 2013 (UTC)

I saw Playing with Fire at the bookstore, and the only thing I remember from the blurb is somehow "pissing into a pot". Cheers, ☯ Bonkers The Clown \(^_^)/ Nonsensical Babble ☯ 06:49, 22 September 2013 (UTC)

The hook is over the maximum length allowed, and the wording is also unclear: it isn't the first collaboration that generated a billion pounds, but rather the total of all the collaborative restaurants located in Blackstone hotels over the years. I've struck the hook, and am looking forward to a new ALT. Thanks. BlueMoonset (talk) 18:54, 26 September 2013 (UTC)

Alt1:... that chef Gordon Ramsay was allowed to open a restaurant at Claridge's hotel because he agreed to serve breakfast? Miyagawa (talk) 19:10, 26 September 2013 (UTC)

I think this works well, though "allowed" is an odd word: the article uses terms like "lease" and "contract", which would be more accurate. (Blackstone asked him, not vice versa.) I also wonder if it might be more hooky if "he agreed to serve" was changed to "his father-in-law agreed that Ramsay would serve". Whatever is decided, the key sentences do need to each have an inline source citation; the one about the breakfast requirement currently does not. BlueMoonset (talk) 19:39, 26 September 2013 (UTC)

Alt2:... that chef Gordon Ramsay was allowed to open a restaurant at Claridge's hotel because his father-in-law agreed that it would serve breakfast?
Added a new alt to replace the first one. I've added an inline cite directly after the hook fact in the article. Miyagawa (talk) 21:35, 26 September 2013 (UTC)

Miyagawa, I moved the new inline cite so it's after the father-in-law sentence, which is crucial to ALT2. The "breakfast" part is also covered in that sentence (it's clear from context); I don't think you also need to cite the previous sentence as well (which is where the cite had been). Restoring approval based on ALT2. BlueMoonset (talk) 03:23, 2 October 2013 (UTC)