Template:Did you know nominations/Eugene Vielle
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- The following is an archived discussion of the DYK nomination of the article below. Please do not modify this page. Subsequent comments should be made on the appropriate discussion page (such as this nomination's talk page, the article's talk page or Wikipedia talk:Did you know), unless there is consensus to re-open the discussion at this page. No further edits should be made to this page.
The result was: promoted by Cwmhiraeth (talk) 05:42, 17 July 2015 (UTC)
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Eugene Vielle
[edit]... that Royal Air Force officer Eugene Vielle developed the "Vielle Bombing System" which led to the Cruise Missile?Alt1 ... that Royal Air Force officer Eugene Vielle flew 150 different types of aircraft during his career?
- Reviewed: Huzoor Palace, Porbandar
Created by Philafrenzy (talk). Self-nominated at 18:24, 26 June 2015 (UTC).
- Long enough, new enough. The start of the sentence that discusses his posting to the Courageous is a little too close to the source text in the Telegraph article. Other than that, no other close paraphrasing issues. Hook is appropriately cited, and article has good inline citations. Needs QPQ. I think the hook is overstating things by saying that the Vielle system "led to" the cruise missile. That implies a causal relationship, which the Telegraph obit claims but doesn't elaborate on. Many people around the world were simultaneously working on systems that could be considered predecessors of the cruise missile. There either needs to be a better source, like a history of missile technology, or the claim needs to be reduced from "which led to" to something like ", an early predecessor of". --diff (talk) 00:42, 29 June 2015 (UTC)
- Thanks, I will take a look at it. Philafrenzy (talk) 08:18, 29 June 2015 (UTC)
- Fixed the sentence you mentioned and toned down the cruise missile claim. Added a new hook and struck the original. Added pic. QPQ next. Philafrenzy (talk) 00:27, 10 July 2015 (UTC)
- QPQ done. Philafrenzy (talk) 01:26, 10 July 2015 (UTC)
- The sentence on which the hook is based is very close to the source:
- Source: By the time he retired from the RAF in 1957, he had flown in 150 different types of aircraft.
- Article: By the time that he retired in 1957, Vielle had risen to the rank of Group Captain and had flown in 150 different types of aircraft.
- Perhaps you could change "flown in" to "piloted"? Also, there is a discrepancy between that statement in the text and the sentence in the lead which states: He claimed to have flown over 150 different types of aircraft during his career. Which is it, a claim or a fact? Yoninah (talk) 23:38, 11 July 2015 (UTC)
- Alt2 ... that Eugene Vielle had flown in 150 different types of aircraft (Bristol Bulldog pictured) by the end of his career with the Royal Air Force?
- It can't be piloted because he was a navigator at first. It says claimed in the article because it is his claim as reported in the source. There is no independent verification but I don't find the claim fantastic given the details we have about his career. I could put "claimed" in the hook but don't we normally try to keep the hook pithy? Philafrenzy (talk) 23:56, 11 July 2015 (UTC)