Template:Did you know nominations/Catt family

The following is an archived discussion of the DYK nomination of the article below. Please do not modify this page. Subsequent comments should be made on the appropriate discussion page (such as this nomination's talk page, the article's talk page or Wikipedia talk:Did you know), unless there is consensus to re-open the discussion at this page. No further edits should be made to this page.

The result was: promoted by 97198 (talk) 12:52, 4 June 2014 (UTC)

Catt family

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~~... that the Catt family, Ronald "Scott" Catt and his children, Hayden and Abigail, were responsible for bank robberies in the Portland, Oregon and Houston, Texas areas?~~

ALT1: ... that the seemingly unremarkable Catt family, father Ronald "Scott" Catt and his children, Hayden and Abigail, pulled off several bank robberies in Oregon and Texas?
Reviewed: grey gull

Created by GenQuest (talk). Self nominated at 18:22, 31 May 2014 (UTC).

The article is new enough and long enough. Checking the sources (all available online), no close paraphrasing or copyvios were found. I've removed some redundant words from the hook to make it a bit punchier. There are a few issues, but they should all be fixable. I think the lead should mention Scott's drugs and alcohol addictions and not merely the "financial difficulties after the death of his wife". DYK articles should be NPOV, especially BLPs. You state "Catt's father had been a loan officer in a local bank, which gave him an insiders knowledge of day-to-day banking procedures—including preferred employee responses to a bank robbery". The source only mentions the first part. Without an RS, the rest sounds like OR. In any event, how does his father's job give Scott the insider knowledge. The sentence, "In 2011, Catt's lost his job and his house was foreclosed on. His children dropped out of school and went to live with relatives" is important and needs a citation. Edwardx (talk) 19:09, 31 May 2014 (UTC)

Article author comment: requested changes made. Thanks for the input. I added an ALT1, which is more impactful, I think. Regards, GenQuest ^{"Talk to Me"} 05:01, 1 June 2014 (UTC)

And thank you for your hard work and diligence on the article. ALT1 approved, and I've struck out the original hook (to avoid any risk of it being promoted instead). Good to go. Edwardx (talk) 09:46, 1 June 2014 (UTC)