Template:Did you know nominations/Callaway Arts & Entertainment
- The following is an archived discussion of the DYK nomination of the article below. Please do not modify this page. Subsequent comments should be made on the appropriate discussion page (such as this nomination's talk page, the article's talk page or Wikipedia talk:Did you know), unless there is consensus to re-open the discussion at this page. No further edits should be made to this page.
The result was: promoted by Yoninah (talk) 12:16, 4 November 2020 (UTC)
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Callaway Arts & Entertainment
... that Callaway Arts & Entertainment was rejected 34 times before a company accepted to publish the first Miss Spider book? Source: A Book Publisher that Makes...Profits? The Other Callaway Empire. Quote: "Callaway discovered series creator David Kirk when he was a struggling artist in upstate New York, bought his first book, and after 34 rejections hit pay dirt in the form of a distribution deal with Scholastic, the world's largest children's book publisher."ALT1:... that the company responsible for the Miss Spider children's series also published Madonna's Sex, which included softcore pornography? Source: A Book Publisher that Makes...Profits? The Other Callaway Empire.
5x expanded by Isabelle Belato (talk). Self-nominated at 20:19, 17 October 2020 (UTC).
| General: Article is new enough and long enough |
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| Policy: Article is sourced, neutral, and free of copyright problems |
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Hook eligibility:
- Cited:
- Interesting:
- Other problems:
- The phrasing for the main hook is a bit awkward. It currently reads as if CA&E was rejected as a company, whereas what we want to say is that its book was rejected. A bit of rephrasing if you prefer that one. For ALT1, I'd rephrase "also published"; doesn't your source https://www.newspapers.com/clip/61242555/some-publishers-are-hoping-little/ just say they produced the book, while Warner published? Both hooks (once tweaked) are acceptable, but out of the two, I'd prefer ALT1; that books are rejected before being accepted is sort of a meme, but that a producer of famous pornography also publishes successful children's works seems more rare.
| QPQ: Done. |
Overall: 
I notice minor phrasing and other issues in a few other places throughout the article. Not terrible, but minor tweaks would be good. Examples:
- "is a family entertainment company" - that implies family-friendly, which Madonna's Sex definitely is not. Do you want "family-owned entertainment company"? In what sense is it a family company - I only see Nicholas mentioned, except for his father showing up to add in an Golf imprint then quickly selling his share?
- Could you add dates to the books the company produced? Especially with the philosophy of only producing a few books at a time, the dates of every one would help draw an accurate picture of the company's progress.
- Before that, the company had helped produce Madonna's book, Sex, together with Warner Books, - how about putting a specific date to this, and putting this in date order, rather than starting with Guitars? Especially if Sex was such a big seller, I'd think we would want to devote more to it, and I don't see leading with Guitars, which is both later and less important. Maybe you could clarify what exactly the did to produce or publish it, as in the ALT1 hook?
- "platform-adnostic" - agnostic?
- was among one of the company's biggest seller - "was among the ... sellers" or "was the biggest seller"
- On that same year - That same year
- The company had its name changed - The company changed its name
- business that were responsible - "business that was responsible" or "businesses that were responsible"
- bein Nova's Ark - being?
- had a viewership higher than that of Bob the Builder's debut - can you make it clear why this is an apt comparison? Was Bob the highest viewership children's program until then? On the same network? If not, maybe just say it's among the highest, or second highest in the year, or third highest in the decade or something, instead of comparing with a specific program?
- an one hour special - a one hour special
- the company established the Callaway Digital Arts, - ... Arts division? Or otherwise explain what it is at the same time. GRuban (talk) 15:10, 19 October 2020 (UTC)
- GRuban: Thanks for the thorough review. I'll be taking a look at this soon and make the appropriate changes. And you are correct the company only produced the books, instead of properly publishing, that's my bad. Thanks again! Isabelle 🔔 15:32, 19 October 2020 (UTC)
- Hi GRuban. I've fixed the mistakes you pointed out and rewrote some of the sections that could use a better explanation. I've also changed the hooks to reflect your criticism (feel free to fix or point out any mistakes I might've done related to the DYK process of changing hooks, as I'm still new to this). New hooks follow:
- ALT0b:... that the first Miss Spider book, produced by Callaway Arts & Entertainment, was rejected 34 times before a company accepted to publish it? Source: A Book Publisher that Makes...Profits? The Other Callaway Empire. Quote: "Callaway discovered series creator David Kirk when he was a struggling artist in upstate New York, bought his first book, and after 34 rejections hit pay dirt in the form of a distribution deal with Scholastic, the world's largest children's book publisher."
- ALT1b:
... that the company responsible for the Miss Spider children's series also produced Madonna's Sex, which included softcore pornography?Source: A Book Publisher that Makes...Profits? The Other Callaway Empire.
- Thanks! Isabelle 🔔 17:33, 19 October 2020 (UTC)
Both hooks are now good, though I still prefer ALT1b. You didn't resolve the "was among one of the company's biggest seller" issue, but seem to have addressed most others. --GRuban (talk) 19:18, 19 October 2020 (UTC)
Hi, I came by to promote ALT1b. Where is the hook fact about softcore pornography mentioned and cited in the article? Yoninah (talk) 01:17, 3 November 2020 (UTC)
- Hi Yoninah. I can't commit to fixing this issue in the near future, so I think it might be best if I withdraw this nomination, which I don't know how to do formally, haha. Isabelle 🔔 11:46, 4 November 2020 (UTC)
- @Isabelle Belato: That's not necessary. All you have to do is delete that hook fact and everything else is fine:
- ALT1c: ... that the company responsible for the Miss Spider children's series also produced Sex by Madonna?
- Restoring tick for ALT1c per GRuban's review. Yoninah (talk) 12:13, 4 November 2020 (UTC)
