Talk:Worcester Castle/GA1

GA Review

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Reviewer: Malleus Fatuorum (talk · contribs) 21:10, 22 October 2011 (UTC)[reply]

Lead

"Despite being a royal castle, the role of constable became passed down within the Beauchamp family, giving them considerable power in the city." What has the Beauchamp family got to do with Worcester Castle? And what's the disconnect between Worcester being a royal castle and the role of constable being passed down the family?

Changes made - see what you think. Hchc2009 (talk) 07:11, 27 October 2011 (UTC)[reply]

"The castle continued to be used as Worcestershire's county gaol until the 19th century". Continued? We haven't been told that it was ever the county gaol.

Fixed. Hchc2009 (talk) 07:11, 27 October 2011 (UTC)[reply]

12th–13th centuries

"Worcester remained a royal castle, but the post of sheriff and that of constable rapidly became hereditary in the Beauchamp family". How could that happen "rapidly"?

I've tweaked. Hchc2009 (talk) 07:11, 27 October 2011 (UTC)[reply]

"King John responded by sending forces to attacking the castle and successfully retaking it."

Changed. Hchc2009 (talk) 07:11, 27 October 2011 (UTC)[reply]

"Meanwhile, the 11th century dispute over the cathedral graveyard had continued unabated". We haven't been told that there was any dispute at all.

I've clarified further in the previous section. Hchc2009 (talk) 07:24, 27 October 2011 (UTC)[reply]

14th–19th centuries

"... Edward IV split up Richard Neville's offices in 1471". I think you need to explain who Richard Neville is, and what "split up his offices" means.

Done. Hchc2009 (talk)

"The final constables were appointed during the 1540s, after which the practice ceased altogether." What practice?

Done. Hchc2009 (talk) 07:24, 27 October 2011 (UTC)[reply]

"In 1628 the castle site was granted to Giles Clutterbuck". By whom?

Clarified. Hchc2009 (talk) 07:24, 27 October 2011 (UTC)[reply]

The discussion above is closed. Please do not modify it. Subsequent comments should be made on the appropriate discussion page. No further edits should be made to this discussion.