Talk:Wood/Water/GA1
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Reviewer: K. Peake (talk · contribs) 18:12, 21 October 2020 (UTC)
Good Article review progress box
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Starting on another one for you soon --K. Peake 18:12, 21 October 2020 (UTC)
Infobox and lead
[edit]- Mid-to-late 2001 → 2001
- Separate studios in the infobox by using flatlist instead
- "on the record label Anti- on" → "by Anti- on"
- "of third studio album" → "of their third studio album,"
- "for the remainder of the year." → "for the remainder of 2000."
- Are you sure the track wasn't recorded with Robert Carranza?
- Target Milwaukee, Wisconsin to Milwaukee
- "Wood/Water moved away from" → "The album moved away from"
- "was met with a generally favorable response from" → "received generally favorable reviews from"
- "the band could promote the album," → "the band promoted it,"
- "embarked on a US tour," → "embarked on an accompanying US tour,"
- "was released as the lead single" → "was released as the album's lead single"
- "The band appeared on Late Night with Conan O'Brien before" → "The Promise Ring appeared on Late Night with Conan O'Brien in May 2002, before"
- "a US support slot followed" → "a US support slot for Jimmy Eat World followed"
- "The Promise Ring appeared on the" → "The band performed for the"
Background
[edit]- Retitle to Background and recording
Writing and Bohlen's illness
[edit]- "third studio album, Very Emergency, in" → "third studio album Very Emergency in"
- Wikilink record label
- "Very Emergency expanded the band's" → "The album expanded the band's"
- "worked on the" → "worked as part of the"
- "tired of playing what" → "were tired of playing what"
- "released the Electric Pink EP in" → "released their sixth EP Electric Pink in"
- "Although the Promise Ring was then" → "Although the band were then"
- "the tour now canceled," → "the tour having been canceled,"
- "supported Bad Religion," → "supported Bad Religion on tour,"
- "style to Nothing Feels Good (1997)." → "style to their second studio album Nothing Feels Good (1997) than Very Emergency."
- "which forced the Promise Ring" → "that forced the Promise Ring"
- "and unable to tour" → "and made them unable to tour"
- Mention what year they couldn't tour for the rest of
- "graphics company; Bohlen and" → "graphics company, while Bohlen and"
- "The band brought" → "The Promise Ring brought"
Pre-production and label change
[edit]- Target Milwaukee, Wisconsin to Milwaukee
- "which differed in style" → "that differed in style"
- "In May of that year," → "In May 2001,"
- "jamming in rehearsal," → "jamming when rehearsing,"
- "although initially writing material" → "although initially wrote material"
- "they re-evaluated and" → "the Promise Ring re-evaluated and"
- "with Jade Tree by March 2001," → "signed to Jade Tree by March 2001,"
- "later in the year." → "later that year."
- "They contacted the band's manager," → "The record label contacted the band's manager,"
- Are you sure "cold" is the correct word here?
- "with that label;" → "with the imprint;"
- "The label was" → "Anti- was"
- "wanted move away" → "wanted to move away"
- "the band and label" → "the band and Jade Tree"
- "less synonymous"," → "less synonymous,""
- "from the Jade Tree sound." → "from the record label's sound."
- "to license the band's releases" → "to license the Promise Ring's releases"
- "to license the Electric Pink EP to Epitaph" → "to license Electric Pink to Epitaph"
- "European release and to" → "European release, and to"
- "the Promise Ring was becoming" → "the Promise Ring were becoming"
Production
[edit]- "the sound they wanted." → "the sound they wanted to create."
- "whom Street produced." → "whom Street had produced for."
- "the band flew to" → "the Promise Ring flew to"
- "They were in" → "The band were in"
- "they decided to" → "the Promise Ring decided to"
- Remove brackets around in the UK
- "The song included" → "The song features"
- "the remainder of the" → "the remained of Wood/Water's"
- "the band had toured with Camden earlier in the year." → "the Promise Ring had toured with Camden earlier in 2001."
- "returned from vacation he said" → "returned from vacation, he said"
- "where they played him the songs'" → "playing him the songs'"
- "to the previous day's recordings." → "to the recordings from each previous day."
- "assisted by Jon Olliffe." → "with assistance from Jon Olliffe."
- "Street and the band ran" → "Street and the Promise Ring ran"
- "on it turned out to be enjoyable." → "on the song turned out to be enjoyable for them."
- "beginning in September" → "beginning in September 2001"
- "The sessions total cost was" → "The total cost for the sessions was"
- 200,000 → $200,000
- "of the band's" → "of the Promise Ring's"
- "at Jacobs except for" → "at Jacobs, except for"
Composition and lyrics
[edit]- "the sound of Wood/Water has been described as" → "Wood/Water has been described as"
- Target alternative pop to Alternative rock
- "from their older emo sound," → "from their old emo sound,"
- Wikilink acoustic guitars
- Target folk to Folk music
- "were also present." → "are also present."
- "was reminiscent of the works by" → "was described as reminiscent of the music by"
- "Wheat and the Delgados." → "Wheat, and the Delgados."
- "Its title is from" → "The title of Wood/Water comes from"
- "and its lyrics addressed" → "and lyrics on Wood/Water address"
- "were related to touring, especially touring for" → "are related to touring, especially the tours for"
- "which was compared to that in" → "that was compared to that on"
- "garage rock-pop song evoked" → "garage rock-pop song evokes"
- "keyboard ending recalled" → "keyboard ending recalls the sound of"
- "set the lyrical tone for the rest of the album." → "sets the lyrical tone for the rest of Wood/Water."
- "Street told the band to" → "During recording, Street told the Promise Ring to"
- Target croquet mallets to Croquet
- "showcasing Bohlen's storytelling" → "that showcases Bohlen's storytelling"
- [36][33][43] should be put in numerical order
- Wikilink synthesizers
- "resembles the band's earlier material" → "resembles their earlier material"
- [36][34][44] put in numerical order
- Target chorus to Refrain
- Wikilink drum machine
- "as the band shifts" → "as the Promise Ring shifts"
- "Reminiscent of 10cc, Bohlen wonders" → "The song is reminiscent of 10cc's style, with Bohlen wondering"
- "which the band had" → "that the band had"
- "despite listening to" → "despite listening to the Smiths' fourth studio album"
- "an ambient country song which" → "an ambient country song, which"
- "The folk rock "My Life Is at Home"" → "The folk rock track "My Life Is at Home""
- Where do any of the sources mention comparisons to the Beach Boys and Weezer?
- I had accidentally copied the wrong URL; fixed with correct one that mentions the comparisons. Yeepsi (talk) 14:01, 22 October 2020 (UTC)
Release
[edit]- Retitle to Release and promotion
- "online on March 3." → "online on March 3 of that year."
- "The band played a" → "The Promise Ring played a"
- "on March 26 on a" → "on March 26, 2001 via a"
- Target 10" vinyl to Phonograph record
- "This version contains one bonus track," → "The version contains one bonus track," with the wikilink per MOS:LINK2SECT
- "the band made two acoustic" → "the Promise Ring delivered two acoustic"
- "in April and May, supported" → "in April and May of 2002, being supported"
- "Arni + Kinski (formerly of GusGus)." → "former GusGus members Arni + Kinski."
- "On May 24," → "On May 24 of that year,"
- "released on May 27." → "released on May 27, 2002."
- "released as a single on July 9;" → "released as the album's lead single on July 9 of that year;" with the wikilink
- "of "Stop Playing Guitar" and" → "of "Stop Playing Guitar" alongside"
- Target CD to Compact disc
- "featured edit and album versions" does it feature multiple edits or just one? either change to "featured edits" or "featured an edit"
- "The band again supported Jimmy Eat World for a" → "Jimmy Eat World were again supported by the Promise Ring for a"
- "in late July and early August." → "in late July and early August of 2002."
- "announced on October 14 that the band" → "announced on October 14, 2002 that they"
Reception
[edit]- Retitle to Critical reception
- "thoughtful musicality", and" → "thoughtful musicality," and"
- "wrote that the" → "said of the album that the"
- "disappeared", replaced by" → "disappeared", being replaced by"
- "songs" which have" → "songs," which have"
- "the album was a" → "the album is a"
- "music critic Adrien Begrand called" → "critic Adrien Begrand called"
- "hearing the band" → "hearing the Promise Ring"
- "slower track", and" → "slower track," and"
- "were a" → "are a"
- "which saw the band" → "that sees the Promise Ring"
- "made it sound more" → "make it sound more"
- "the Promise Ring; it wasn't a" → "the Promise Ring; he said the album wasn't a"
- Target hook to Hook (music)
- "However, the album" → "However, he opined that the album"
- ""admirable", "you" → ""admirable," DiCrescenzo explained that "you"
- Wikilink Sizzler
Track listing
[edit]- except "Say Goodbye Good" by → except "Say Goodbye Good", produced by
Personnel
[edit]- Target Quincy McCrary to Quetzal (band)
- Any specific order for the Production personnel?
- I put them in the order as they appear in the booklet. Yeepsi (talk) 14:01, 22 October 2020 (UTC)
References
[edit]- Copyvio score looks good at 21.3%
- Make sure all of these are archived by using the tool
- WP:OVERLINK of Anti- on ref 17
- Various publications calling the album pop: → Citations regarding publications calling the album pop: on ref 32
- Cite Pitchfork as work instead for ref 34
- WP:OVERLINK of The A.V. Club on ref 36
- WP:OVERLINK of NME on ref 40
- MOS:CAPS issues with ref 52; ANTI is the part with the issues here since it is not stylised like that, though MP3 is fine since it is supposed to be in that style of capitalisation
- Fix MOS:QWQ issues with refs 55 and 61
- Wikilink CMJ New Music Monthly under sources per MOS:LINK2SECT
External links
[edit]- Good
Final comments and verdict
[edit]- On hold though do not feel afraid to reach out if you are somewhat confused about any of the requested changes; let's hope your response speed is on track with the previous rate though. --K. Peake 12:30, 22 October 2020 (UTC)
- Done. Yeepsi (talk) 14:01, 22 October 2020 (UTC)
- Yeepsi I did some brief copyediting where issues still needed fixing; a word of advice for next time would be to look through the requested changes yourself and double check that you have done them all before claiming to be done. ✓ Pass time has come now though, good job! --K. Peake 17:45, 22 October 2020 (UTC)
- Done. Yeepsi (talk) 14:01, 22 October 2020 (UTC)