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Talk:Wonder Mountain's Guardian/GA1

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GA Review

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Reviewer: The Rambling Man (talk · contribs) 19:37, 29 August 2014 (UTC)[reply]


I'll take a look at this one. The Rambling Man (talk) 19:37, 29 August 2014 (UTC)[reply]

Comments

  • "The idea of having a..." not great, perhaps something like "The concept of a..."?
    Done.--Dom497 (talk) 12:35, 30 August 2014 (UTC)[reply]
  • "These animations are accompanied by other special effects such as wind." do you think you should explain that's how it becomes a 4D ride? It would help us non-experts....
Done.--Dom497 (talk) 12:35, 30 August 2014 (UTC)[reply]
  • "Wonder Mountain's Guardian's lift hill outside its namesake mountain, Wonder Mountain" three "mountains" in one sentence... rephrase needed.
Done.--Dom497 (talk) 12:35, 30 August 2014 (UTC)[reply]
  • Is it "interactive dark ride" or "Interactive Dark Ride" (per infobox)? I imagine the former, be consistent. Also, sometimes it's in quote marks, sometimes not.
Well, the model (by TrioTech) is IDR (Interactive....) so I put that instead.--Dom497 (talk) 12:35, 30 August 2014 (UTC)[reply]
I'm still unclear, there are still three variations of Interactive Dark Ride, interactive dark ride and "interactive dark ride". The Rambling Man (talk) 07:51, 31 August 2014 (UTC)[reply]
So here's what I did. In the infobox, I left it in capitals because that is the model of the ride. In the article, I put it in lowercase because, from a readers perspective, there could be confusion over the type of ride and model. It is much easier to explain the type of ride. Make sense?--Dom497 (talk) 20:43, 1 September 2014 (UTC)[reply]
I think it's ok, but understand, as a non-expert reader, it's a little anomalous to see the same phrase formatted in three different ways in the same article, regardless of what you're trying to express. The Rambling Man (talk) 20:47, 1 September 2014 (UTC)[reply]
Actually, its 2 now...I removed the quotations. :P --Dom497 (talk) 20:49, 1 September 2014 (UTC)[reply]
  • "It wasn't until" avoid contractions.
Done.--Dom497 (talk) 12:35, 30 August 2014 (UTC)[reply]
  • "began to be put in place." perhaps "built" rather than "put in place"? Just looking to tighten the prose a little.
Done.--Dom497 (talk) 12:35, 30 August 2014 (UTC)[reply]
  • "ten contractors and over 47 workers" MOSNUM, so 10 and 47, and also "more than 47" not "over 47". Perhaps "at least 47" would be better.
Done.--Dom497 (talk) 12:35, 30 August 2014 (UTC)[reply]
  • You wait until the third instance of Halloween Haunt before linking it...
Done.--Dom497 (talk) 12:35, 30 August 2014 (UTC)[reply]
  • Drop in the infobox (30 ft (9.1 m)) probably doesn't need that decimal place.
  • No need to link common terms like "gold".
Done.--Dom497 (talk) 12:35, 30 August 2014 (UTC)[reply]
  • Could you scatter those citations appropriately or is [6][12][24][25][26][27][28] the only way to do it?
Not really. Those refs support things mentioned all over that paragraph....so unless you want duplicates, I think it should stay as is.--Dom497 (talk) 00:22, 31 August 2014 (UTC)[reply]
  • "back to back " normally hyphenated.
Done.--Dom497 (talk) 12:35, 30 August 2014 (UTC)[reply]
  • "90-degrees." not hyphenated.
Done.--Dom497 (talk) 12:35, 30 August 2014 (UTC)[reply]
  • "drop track. A drop track is a" merge, perhaps, "drop track, a roller coaster element which... " or something.
Done.--Dom497 (talk) 12:35, 30 August 2014 (UTC)[reply]
  • No need to link common terms like "bat" or "sword" or "fish" or "reptile" etc...
Done.--Dom497 (talk) 12:35, 30 August 2014 (UTC)[reply]
  • Several YouTube links, do they meet WP:RS?
They do. To save both of us time, I'll explain every YouTube ref.

REF 2: You can't get any better than a high ranking official from Wonderland and the guy who made all the interactive content giving you "insider" info.

REF 5: If you compare pictures from ref 4 to the video, you'll be able to tell that the POV is real/the right ride.

REF 24: This channel is the official YouTube channel for TrioTech. Also, Wonderland posted the exact same video on their facebook/youtube pages.

REF 25: POV matches POV from ref 26, just on the other side.

REF 26: There shouldn't be any question about this ref. :)

REF 27: Comes from the official City TV YouTube channel. And the video is the exact broadcast.--Dom497 (talk) 00:22, 31 August 2014 (UTC)[reply]

Just a few issues to cover, I'll place it on hold. The Rambling Man (talk) 08:28, 30 August 2014 (UTC)[reply]

@The Rambling Man: I have addressed all your issues.--Dom497 (talk) 00:22, 31 August 2014 (UTC)[reply]

One other thing I've just noticed, the overall cost is noted and referenced in the infobox but not mentioned at all in the prose which seems a little odd to me. The Rambling Man (talk) 07:52, 31 August 2014 (UTC)[reply]
@The Rambling Man: Done.--Dom497 (talk) 20:43, 1 September 2014 (UTC)[reply]
I'll try to get some time to take a final look tomorrow. The Rambling Man (talk) 20:47, 1 September 2014 (UTC)[reply]
Sorry, things got the better of me, too selfish. Will check in tomorrow as soon as I can to complete this review. The Rambling Man (talk) 20:31, 2 September 2014 (UTC)[reply]
No worries! :) --Dom497 (talk) 22:25, 2 September 2014 (UTC)[reply]

I can't see any major outstanding issues here, so I'm happy to pass it as GA. The Rambling Man (talk) 06:21, 3 September 2014 (UTC)[reply]

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