Talk:Whatever (Ayumi Hamasaki song)/GA1

GA Review

The following discussion is closed. Please do not modify it. Subsequent comments should be made on the appropriate discussion page. No further edits should be made to this discussion.

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Reviewer: Calvin999 (talk · contribs) 07:34, 18 June 2015 (UTC)[reply]

Hello, I'm Calvin999 and I am reviewing this article.

Review

Multiple dead link
Use Flat list templates for the genres, record labels, writers etc. in the info box
The certification parameter in the info box is redundant now, no on uses it.
Does Japan follow British or American system for dates?
The first paragraph has no flow at all, just lots of short sentences, and is boring to read.
some who commended the production and lyrical content. → And? What is this telling the read? Needs re-phrasing
However, some critics dismissed the vocal delivery and composition. → You can't really dismiss a vocal delivery
Released in Japan and Taiwan, it peaked at number five on the Oricon Singles Chart. → is Oricon Japanese or Taiwanese?
It has also appeared on several tours and countdown live shows conducted by Hamasaki. → included on (Songs don't appear, they are included)
It features interludes of a young boy in an angel costume. → An interlude is a short piece of music to bridge one song to another. I think mean intercut
Lead should be two paragraphs. Article isn't long enough for 3.
These issues are from the lead alone. Looking down, here are obvious errors:
Why does a Reception section come before the release section? A song needs to be released before anyone can listen to it to review it.
An alternative cover was shot for the single release but was re-issued → And? What is this meant to convey?
There is next to no relevant commentary on the re-release cover, so it should be removed from the info box.
the 8 cm format → Why is there a gap?
Currently, the music video is not officially released on YouTube, → This is useless info. Music videos do not have to go on YouTube. If it didn't happen, then don't write about it.
Credits and personnel section and Track listing section have a lot of white space. Both sections should be two columns.
Charts, peaks and positions → Really? Charts and certifications is fine
Both tables need to conform to WP:ACCESS. Three separate tables for peaks with the shaded column, and same for Certifications#
Certifications box should be updated to the new one like on "You Don't Know What to Do"
Reference wise:
The Village Voice should be in italics
HMV should not be in italics
HMV appears several times but worded differently (HMV; Hmv.co.jp)
Oricon should not be italics
Capitals should not be use in the reference titles
Overlinking of Count Down TV. Only link the first time.
The source for the genres redirects. So the genres are technically not sourced.

Summary

GA review – see WP:WIAGA for criteria

Is it reasonably well written?
A. Prose is "clear and concise", without copyvios, or spelling and grammar errors:

B. MoS compliance for lead, layout, words to watch, fiction, and lists:
Is it factually accurate and verifiable?
A. Has an appropriate reference section:

B. Citation to reliable sources where necessary:

C. No original research:
Is it broad in its coverage?
A. Major aspects:

B. Focused:
Is it neutral?
Fair representation without bias:
Is it stable?
No edit wars, etc:
Does it contain images to illustrate the topic?
A. Images are tagged with their copyright status, and valid fair use rationales are provided for non-free content:

B. Images are provided if possible and are relevant to the topic, and have suitable captions:
Overall:
Pass or Fail:

Outcome

I'm sorry but this article is a bit of a mess. I can't pass it in this condition. — Calvin999 07:53, 18 June 2015 (UTC)[reply]

The discussion above is closed. Please do not modify it. Subsequent comments should be made on the appropriate discussion page. No further edits should be made to this discussion.