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GA Review

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Article (edit | visual edit | history) · Article talk (edit | history) · Watch

Reviewer: Casliber (talk · contribs) 00:31, 5 August 2013 (UTC)[reply]

Right, I will be reviewing this one and making straightforward copyedits as I go (please revert if I accidentally change the meaning) - I will jot queries below. Cas Liber (talk · contribs) 00:31, 5 August 2013 (UTC)[reply]

Football NSW stated its dislike to Lowy's autocratic style - dislike of
 Done--2nyte (talk) 11:01, 5 August 2013 (UTC)[reply]
These forums helped shape the club to a specific culture and style. - the idea of supporters' forums deciding how a club can play I find hard to digest. Supporters can wish for bright attacking football (doesn't everybody?) but surely that is up to the coach and players?
Feel free to re-word it. I wanted to specify that the club is and desires to be very community oriented; community engagement is a primary focus to the club and has been from establishment. Source--2nyte (talk) 15:50, 7 August 2013 (UTC)[reply]
Yeah - I re-read the source. I rejigged it a little but tried to keep true to the source. Cas Liber (talk · contribs) 20:56, 7 August 2013 (UTC)[reply]
I'd mention the tanking of the Rovers some years previously. Only needs one or two sentences.
 Done; added brief note on FFA's attempt of pursuing a second Sydney club.--2nyte (talk) 15:31, 7 August 2013 (UTC)[reply]
The main of these were in moving the club from Parramatta Stadium to the Sydney Football Stadium in the Sydney CBD - mentioned two sentences before. Can this be streamlined or abbreviated?
 Done; streamlined the section.--2nyte (talk) 15:31, 7 August 2013 (UTC)[reply]
Para 3 in Foundations is very repetitive - several sentences are repetitious and could be trimmed. If you want me to take a crack at it I am happy to.
Again, feel free to re-word it. I do agree that it could be trimmed down.--2nyte (talk) 15:50, 7 August 2013 (UTC)[reply]
After a history making start, the club appeared in the Cup finals and won their first A-League Premiership - I was about to add a hyphen to make "history-making" but then wondered why the start was history-making.....
 Done; re-worded the second sentence.--2nyte (talk) 15:31, 7 August 2013 (UTC)[reply]
Do the club have any relationship with other local western Sydney clubs such as Marconi or Sydney United etc.?
No specific relation to any local clubs, though it is well supported by the western Sydney community including local governments and Marconi Stallions FC (again no specific relationship with club besides the casual acknowledgment).--2nyte (talk) 15:50, 7 August 2013 (UTC)[reply]
To give the article balance, I think the Inaugural season section is too brief really. A few more sentences would be good.
I summarised that section, and wouldn't really know what to expand on.--2nyte (talk) 15:50, 7 August 2013 (UTC)[reply]
Any particular thrilling wins? biggest win? memorable matches?
NB: Don't forget to tweak the formatting of the licence on this photo - File:New Sydney A-League Club Announcement.jpg

More in morning. I will try to copyedit later and am trying to give it as big a shove as possible towards FAC.....polishing up quite nicely...Cas Liber (talk · contribs) 15:10, 5 August 2013 (UTC)[reply]

Query

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What's the status of this review? It's been over three weeks since anything was posted. There do seem to have been a number of edits to the article in the interim... Thanks. BlueMoonset (talk) 14:56, 1 September 2013 (UTC)[reply]


1. Well written?:

Prose quality:
Manual of Style compliance:

2. Factually accurate and verifiable?:

References to sources:
Citations to reliable sources, where required:
No original research:

3. Broad in coverage?:

Major aspects:
Focused:

4. Reflects a neutral point of view?:

Fair representation without bias:

5. Reasonably stable?

No edit wars, etc. (Vandalism does not count against GA):

6. Illustrated by images, when possible and appropriate?:

Images are copyright tagged, and non-free images have fair use rationales:
Images are provided where possible and appropriate, with suitable captions:


Overall:

Pass or Fail: - look, I think the article is nearly there. A little bit on some of the opening season and i'd be happy. However, the ongoing issues with soccer/football terminology lead me to wind this up now and re-examine in future once the debate is settled. I will be happy to re-review at a later date. Cas Liber (talk · contribs) 12:42, 8 September 2013 (UTC)[reply]