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Talk:Vladimír Remek/GA2

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Reviewer: The Rambling Man (talk · contribs) 09:59, 31 August 2015 (UTC)[reply]


Comments this is a neat article, a few minor things you might like to address:

  • European Union is overlinked in the lead and in the "Intercosmos program" section.
  • You could link "Czech Ambassador to Russia" in the lead.
  • Instead of "current" we normally use "as of" e.g. "as of 2015..."
  • "1970–1995" don't normally repeat the century in a year range within the same century.
  • "n the Czechoslovak Air Force.[12][8] " could we order the references numerically please?
  • Quite a few short sentences breaks up the flow of the prose, could use smoothing, e.g. " Hana Davidová. She was the daughter of politician" could easily be made " Hana Davidová, the daughter of politician"...
  • I don't think it's safe to assume that our readers know what ČSLA means without expanding it first.
  • "was Oldřich Pelčák the other" needs a comma before the.
  • "and starring Remek" this is an odd way of putting it unless it's a quote, in which case it should be "starring".
  • " Jean-Loup Chrétien experienced t..." maybe introduce him as "the first Frenchman in space" or "French astronaut Jean-Loup..." or similar.
  • Minor point but ISBNs are preferred e.g. ISBN 978-0-300-14424-6.
  • Ref 21, for instance, needs an en-dash in the page range, not a hyphen.
  • Ref 26 missing a publisher and/or a work.
  • You mention his "first wife" but not any others, is there more to add here?

I'll put the article on hold for a bit while these are looked at. The Rambling Man (talk) 07:55, 4 September 2015 (UTC)[reply]

I also note from File:Kozmonauti V Remec a V Gubarev v epoxidovom ruchu.jpg that he appears to have been honoured by a statue somewhere, this is worth mentioning. The Rambling Man (talk) 08:02, 5 September 2015 (UTC)[reply]