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Talk:Veronica Clare/GA1

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GA Review

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Reviewer: J Milburn (talk · contribs) 13:48, 31 December 2017 (UTC)[reply]


I've never heard of this programme, but the lead grabbed me!

  • Thank you! I found this show to be very fascinating. Hopefully, one day, I will actually be able to watch this. I greatly appreciate your comments, and will try to get to all of them today. Aoba47 (talk) 19:34, 31 December 2017 (UTC)[reply]
  • Would it not be usual to say that it was a crime drama in the first line, as it is no longer made?
  • I think that it is one of those things in which you write about fiction in the present tense. The show may not be made anymore, but it still is a crime drama. To say "was" may imply that it is no longer a crime drama rather than reflecting on the state of its production. Hope that makes sense. Aoba47 (talk) 19:24, 31 December 2017 (UTC)[reply]
  • "The show was developed as one of three television programs ordered by Lifetime" I think a bit more is needed here; three ordered in that year? Three ordered from a particular studio?
  • "Professors Eileen R. Meehan and Jackie Byars" I think it would be more useful to specify their fields than just name them as professors.
  • "In several episodes, she is shown writing letters to an unidentified lover whose gender is never revealed" Who is the She, here?
  • "ordered by Lifetime during this time" Perhaps you could be a little clearer about what that time was?
  • "were The Hidden Room and Confessions of a Crime" Notable? Don't be scared of redlinks!
  • "After picking up the series for 13 episodes" Presumably, you mean Veronica Clare here? The previous sentence was talking about three separate shows!
  • I would quite like a little more detail about the plots of each episode. If this isn't possible, the current set-up is fine!
  • Unfortunately, I could not find any of the episodes online (most likely as it is a show from the early 1990s) and I could not find any sources that went further into the episodes beyond the descriptions present. One day, I may check it out from the Library of Congress (if I am ever in the area again) to expand these parts. I also just would love to watch this series in full either way lol. Aoba47 (talk) 19:24, 31 December 2017 (UTC)[reply]
  • "Scholar Eithne Johnson" Again, I think I'd be more interested disciplines than merely "scholar"!
  • "The titles of the films were Affairs with Death, Deadly Minds, Naked Hearts, and Slow Violence; they can be requested through the Library of Congress as video reels.[12][21][22][23]" If you have the information, it might be useful to specify which episodes went into which films.
  • Unfortunately, I could not find a reliable source that specified which episodes were combined to make the television films. I found this source about it here, but it is not that reliable unfortunately. Aoba47 (talk) 19:32, 31 December 2017 (UTC)[reply]
  • "Clare and Robinson are compared with other fictional female detectives and actresses." I don't really like this sentence. How about "Clare has been compared with other fictional female detectives, and Robinson with noted actresses" or something?
  • "Critics analyzed Clare's identity as a female detective." have analyzed, maybe?
  • "Clare's role as the narrator" This should be mentioned in the "Premise and characters" section!
  • Relatedly, would a cast list not be common for articles of this sort? You probably know that corner of the MOS better than I!
  • That is a good point; for the previous television articles that I had pass through the GAN and FAC process, I turned what traditionally would have been a cast list into prose. I am not certain if a cast list would be necessary here as all of the information can be located in the "Premise and characters" section, but I am more than open to any suggestions. Aoba47 (talk) 19:28, 31 December 2017 (UTC)[reply]
  • "University of Arizona professor Susan White" Again, I'm more interested in her expertise than her affiliation or job title!
  • I'm not going to quibble about reference formatting, and my only question is about the reliability of TV Tango; that's pretty core information- do you not have a better source?
  • That is a good point. It is funny to imagine Chakotay in this kind of show. I am not certain about adding images of these actors though; none of them received a significant amount of coverage from critical commentary (to the best of my knowledge, only Laura Robinson received any sort of critical coverage of the sort), and I am not entirely sure how to incorporate one of the images into the article without it appearing like it is just decorative (if that makes any sense). I am more than open to any suggestions though. Aoba47 (talk) 19:37, 31 December 2017 (UTC)[reply]

Other than that, this looks very much GA-ready; I think you've pitched it well, and I found the discussion about gender very interesting. Josh Milburn (talk) 13:48, 31 December 2017 (UTC)[reply]

And please double-check my edits! Josh Milburn (talk) 13:48, 31 December 2017 (UTC)[reply]
  • Will do; thank you for your help so far! I am glad that you enjoyed the article; I had a lot of fun writing this one. I am slowly getting to all of your comments. I will ping you once I complete everything. Feel free to provide feedback to any of my comments of course though in the meantime. Aoba47 (talk) 19:45, 31 December 2017 (UTC)[reply]
I'm happy that this is where it needs to be for GA status, so I'm promoting now. Good job! 17:33, 1 January 2018 (UTC)
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