Talk:Undertale/GA2

GA Review

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Reviewer: Anarchyte (talk · contribs) 02:15, 15 May 2016 (UTC)[reply]

I presume the nominators want a quick but in-depth review, since GA1's result was reversed. Anarchyte (work | talk) 02:15, 15 May 2016 (UTC)[reply]

Section review

Overall comments/Misc

Copyvio rating: 16.0% chance of violation of this page.

There was a 32.4% similarity rating with this page but it took its content from Wikipedia.

Did you find this through the dup detector, or some other tool? I'm not 100% sure how it works, but it looks like the only actual matches are instances of WP quoting The Escapist.--IDV^talk 23:38, 15 May 2016 (UTC)[reply]

Is it Underground or underground? In the lead, the word underground is capitalised but in the gameplay sections, they're all lowercase. Please specify this. Anarchyte (work | talk) 03:41, 15 May 2016 (UTC)[reply]

It's Underground when it's the name of the game world ("Undertale takes place in the Underground"), and it's underground when it's just used as an adjective ("Players explore an underground world"), so it seems it's used correctly.--IDV^talk 12:36, 15 May 2016 (UTC)[reply]

Lead

Everything is fine here.

I made 2 minor edits to the lead in this edit. I added a comma and removed a wikilink which had already been linked. Anarchyte (work | talk) 03:41, 15 May 2016 (UTC)[reply]

Gameplay

In the game, players control a child, and complete objectives to progress through the story.

Reword to Throughout the game, players control a child and complete objectives in order to progress through the story.

Done--IDV^talk 12:36, 15 May 2016 (UTC)[reply]

Save points frequently appear in the world, refilling players' health while saving their progress.

Reword to Save points, which appear frequently in the game refill the players' health as well as saving their progress.

Done--IDV^talk 12:36, 15 May 2016 (UTC)[reply]

Reference 1 is by JayIsGames and according to WP:VG/S, it is situationally reliable, when the article is written by Jay Bibby. This article is written by "Dora", so I'm unsure about its reliability. Can someone please double check the reliability of this site? With this said, everything said in the first paragraph is referenced by this source. Anarchyte (work | talk) 03:41, 15 May 2016 (UTC)[reply]

Working on replacing this ref...--IDV^talk 00:47, 16 May 2016 (UTC)[reply]

Done Had to cut some minor stuff that wasn't covered in reliable sources, but it doesn't use the JayIsGames ref anymore.--IDV^talk 01:33, 16 May 2016 (UTC)[reply]

There's no reason for the 3rd reference to be after the first line in the 2nd paragraph. The 2nd reference does a good job at covering everything said. It's mentioned 1 line later, anyway.

Done--IDV^talk 23:43, 15 May 2016 (UTC)[reply]

For some boss encounters to be completed peacefully,

Add In order for some[...] to the start of this sentence.

Done--IDV^talk 12:36, 15 May 2016 (UTC)[reply]

Monsters will converse with players during battle, and the game updates players on the monster's feelings and actions.

Reword to Monsters will converse with players during the battles, and the game will tell the players what the monster's feelings and actions are.

Done--IDV^talk 12:36, 15 May 2016 (UTC)[reply]

Plot

Underground or underground? (See #Overall comments/Misc)

When Asriel returned their body to the humans, they attacked and killed him, leading Asgore to declare war

Would this be better as When Asriel returned their body to the humans, they attacked and killed him, resulting in Asgore declaring war?

Done Yeah, I think that works better.--IDV^talk 12:36, 15 May 2016 (UTC)[reply]

Development

A statistic could be added here, after The campaign was launched on June 25, 2013 with a goal of US$5,000; it ended on July 25, 2013, with US$51,124 raised by 2,398 people.

The campaign was launched on June 25, 2013 with a goal of US$5,000; it ended on July 25, 2013, with US$51,124 raised by 2,398 people (1022.48% of the original goal). Referenced by Ref16

Done--IDV^talk 00:13, 16 May 2016 (UTC)[reply]

Reword The idea for the game originated when Fox created a battle system using the game creation system GameMaker: Studio, which Undertale followed.

Undertale's creation ensued after Fox created a battle system using the game creation system GameMaker: Studio. Ensued could also be followed, was a result of, etc

Done--IDV^talk 00:13, 16 May 2016 (UTC)[reply]

Ref17 (Existential Gamer) isn't listed at WP:VG/S
Ref18 (seagaia) is a WP:BLOG and is probably unreliable. Isn't listed at WP:VG/S either
- Those two are interviews. They're fine to use. GamerPro64 16:48, 15 May 2016 (UTC)[reply]

Game design

Everything's fine here

Writing

See above message about Ref18

Music

Everything's fine here

Release

Everything's fine here, I don't see any way this could be expanded or chaged

Reception

The comparison (in the 4th reference) to Cave Story could probably been included towards the end

Done, I think. Unsure how exactly you want this to be implemented.--IDV^talk 00:27, 16 May 2016 (UTC)[reply]

@IDV: Not entirely necessary, but I meant something along the lines of "Destructoid writer Ben Davis gave Undertale a 10/10 and compared it to Cave Story, as it handles its mechanics in the same manner". Anarchyte (work | talk) 06:37, 16 May 2016 (UTC)[reply]

Remove Ref43. Unnecessary, it's not used anywhere else and there are already 2 more references referencing that cult statement. Cliqist also isn't listed on WP:VG/S.

Done--IDV^talk 00:17, 16 May 2016 (UTC)[reply]

Accolades

Everything's fine here

Overall review

GA review – see WP:WIAGA for criteria

Is it reasonably well written?
A. Prose is "clear and concise", without copyvios, or spelling and grammar errors:

B. MoS compliance for lead, layout, words to watch, fiction, and lists:
Is it factually accurate and verifiable?
A. Has an appropriate reference section:

B. Citation to reliable sources where necessary:

C. No original research:
Is it broad in its coverage?
A. Major aspects:

B. Focused:
Is it neutral?
Fair representation without bias:
Is it stable?
No edit wars, etc: - There's the occasional plot inclusion debate, but that's about it.
Does it contain images to illustrate the topic?
A. Images are tagged with their copyright status, and valid fair use rationales are provided for non-free content:

B. Images are provided if possible and are relevant to the topic, and have suitable captions:
Overall:
Pass or Fail: (Passed)

Putting on hold until the errors get responses/fixed. Anarchyte (work | talk) 07:00, 15 May 2016 (UTC)[reply]

@Anarchyte: I left two replies with questions above, under #Overall comments/Misc and #Reception, but other than that I think all points have been fixed or otherwise addressed now.--IDV^talk 01:33, 16 May 2016 (UTC)[reply]

@IDV: I've responded to your comment in Reception, but as it's such a minor thing, I'm gonna pass this article. Anarchyte (work | talk) 06:39, 16 May 2016 (UTC)[reply]