Talk:Typhoon Alice (1953)/GA1
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Reviewer: Hurricane Noah (talk · contribs) 22:45, 8 December 2020 (UTC)
Doing. NoahTalk 22:45, 8 December 2020 (UTC)
Typhoon Alice was a typhoon that bought severe flooding to Guam during the 1953 Pacific typhoon season.
I get that you want to relate the storm to the season, but I don't think this timeframe is specific enough since the season encompasses the whole year.
- Make sure you say "the JTWC" and "the JMA". The article can't be omitted even though it is an abbreviation. This issue is throughout the whole article.
and JTWC reported that the storm had intensified to 65 knots (75 mph; 120 km/h), equivalent to a Category 1 typhoon on the Saffir–Simpson scale, one day later
This should be split off into its own sentence. The time should be moved to the beginning of the sentence.
Northwest of Guam, the typhoon traveled northeastwards, reaching its peak of 100 kn (115 mph; 185 km/h) late on October 18 near Iwo Jima
Two locations in the same sentence don't bode well.
- Picked the latter location. Nova Crystallis (Talk) 08:37, 23 December 2020 (UTC)
Alice then steadily weakened, down to a tropical storm on October 20
You need a present participle rather than an adverb for this and any appropriate adjustments.
- Removed the comma. Nova Crystallis (Talk) 07:36, 3 January 2021 (UTC)
- Is there a reason why rainfall is reported in centimeters? We usually use millimeters.
- Why do you mention pressures multiple times? They generally aren't important if the storm is still building up. The peak appears to be the only important one here.
- I feel like mentioning them while strengthening/weakening to a category isn't that big of a deal. Without them I think the meteorological history might be too short. Nova Crystallis (Talk) 00:07, 20 December 2020 (UTC)
- On the first mention of pressure, link Atmospheric Pressure.
- You should mention JTWC winds are 1-minute sustained and JMA winds are 10-minute sustained
- I think that is moot because JMA did not have wind speeds for these storms. Nova Crystallis (Talk) 23:59, 9 December 2020 (UTC)
by reconnaissance flights
Who did these flights?
historic western north Pacific tropical cyclone record
"the" before this?
just not observed
--> but were not observed
Alice began to steadily weaken later that day, to
You need more than a preposition here
- Removed comma. Nova Crystallis (Talk) 20:18, 6 January 2021 (UTC)
typhoon strength to 60 kn (70 mph; 110 km/h)
same thing here
As Alice traveled near the International Date Line (IDL), the storm had weakened to 35 kn (40 mph; 65 km/h) at 18:00 UTC
--> Alice traveled near the International Date Line (IDL) and had weakened to 35 kn (40 mph; 65 km/h) at 18:00 UTC...
- Maybe mention baroclinicity for the restrenthening?
- I don't have the report to back this up, and neither does DTIC. I don't want to assume anything from some best track files. Nova Crystallis (Talk) 23:59, 9 December 2020 (UTC)
- You should abbreviate the US units
was also recorded on the island
should be were since it is two items.
three to four feet (0.91 to 1.22 m)
"3 to 4" so US numbers are consistently displayed in the article. There are more occurrences of this.
500 yards (460 m)
Should be ft here for consistency
- Keeping it close to the source. Nova Crystallis (Talk) 04:23, 10 December 2020 (UTC)
The fourth death was a farmer dying from a heart attack in his pasture during the storm, who had been previously reported as drowned.
This seems a little clunky. The last tidbit could be sectioned off with a semi colon instead of a comma
winds of 70 mph (110 km/h) were reported on the island
sustained winds?
- Not sure, it wasn't proven by the newspaper. Nova Crystallis (Talk) 23:59, 9 December 2020 (UTC)
- That should be it. NoahTalk 01:03, 9 December 2020 (UTC)