Talk:Tricia Tanaka Is Dead/GA1

GA Review

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Reviewer: Queenieacoustic (talk) 16:58, 3 May 2011 (UTC)[reply]

I will review this later today or tomorrow. Queenieacoustic (talk) 16:58, 3 May 2011 (UTC)[reply]

Comments

Plot

Why isn't Hurley's actor mentioned?
... killing those inside, which include Tricia Tanaka ... "Including ..." sounds better to me.
Hurley arrives home, telling his mother his intent to go to Australia to end the curse. What curse? Needs to be explained.
Hurley learns that Charlie Pace (Dominic Monaghan) believes that Desmond Hume (Henry Ian Cusick) sees visions of him dying. This sentence is slightly confusing. By "him", do you mean Hurley or Desmond, or Charlie?

Production

Jorge Garcia's full name is mentioned twice in the in the section. Just refer to him as Garcia other than the first time.
Put a comma after "Camaro".
In the image caption, type (pictured) after "Actor Daniel Dae Kim".

Reception

Before "An estimated...", add "On its original American broadcast on (date),"
...making it the 24th most watched of the week. Most watched scripted program? Most watched television program overall?
He continued that it as... I'm assuming it's "was"?
...disarming in a way it... Add [the series] after "it".
Jose Garcia should only be wiki-linked the first time he is mentioned (aside from the Lead section), which should be in the Plot section.

Lead

...the tenth episode of the third season of Lost. Write: ...the tenth episode of Lost's third season.
It was first aired... Drop the "was".
Why is the broadcast date mentioned twice? You should probably mention ABC the first time and leave out the broadcast date the second time.

So as you can see, there aren't really any major problems here, just a couple of small mistakes. I will put the article on hold for seven days so that changes can be made. Good luck! Queenieacoustic (talk) 11:30, 4 May 2011 (UTC)[reply]

All of your helpful suggestions have now been addressed. Thanks for the review, Ruby2010 comment! 20:17, 4 May 2011 (UTC)[reply]

Well done! Queenieacoustic (talk) 20:37, 4 May 2011 (UTC)[reply]